I Am Divinity

Session 1

Channeled by John McCurdy during a live Zoom session on 11 October 2023

This transcript has been edited from the original recording to ensure that the intended meaning is conveyed as clearly as possible. Note that Hmm, Mmm, and lines with just a dot signify places to pause, and to feel into what is being said.

Thank you to Chris Vandermeer for managing Zoom during the session, and for helping to prepare this transcript.

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John: Okay, welcome everybody!

Welcome to the first session of I Am Divinity!

I’m excited about this class! And my soul is excited about this class!

We only have a small group to start with, and there are only two of us here right now. Chris, who helps me with Zoom and with the transcribing and other things, and myself. Thank you, Chris!

Someone else should be here in a little while, but we’re going to go ahead and start.

So, let’s go ahead and play the music, Chris, and let’s get started and see where Master Anna wants to go.

[music plays]

Master Anna: I am that I am!

Master Anna, of Magical Service! Here to do some magic with you today, whether you are joining in here live or listening in later, or reading later.

There are several people already in this class who will be reading later, because they don’t understand English. And it’s so wonderful that their energies are here! We feel them.

Ahh…

So welcome, each one of you!

There is no time, except in your human experience, so it doesn’t matter when you come in here. You are still here, right here, right now.

Hmm…

Ah, and yes, I am John’s soul. And I’m working with John, for he’s still having some residue of some issues from other lifetimes that make it difficult for him to talk just as the human at the beginning of these programs. When he feels the pressure his words still try to run away, and I’m working with him on that.

The time is coming soon, or we should say, a point in his experience, where we are so blended together that it’s just me. Master Anna, Master John, human John, all together.

And for now we are still going through the integration, as are so many of you.

Ahh…

I Am Divinity!

What a beautiful realization!

And you are divinity too, each one of you.

You are, you could say, a divine being. But it’s so much more than that.

You ARE divinity.

You always have been!

Mmm…

[Monika comes in on Zoom]

Ah, here comes someone else.

Hello Monica! We’ve already started. It’s just the three of us.

Monica: Hello, everyone! Yeah, good to see you. I’m sorry that I have a delay.

Master Anna: No problem.

Monica: Thank you very much.

Chris:Lovely to have you, hello.

Monica: Hello, Christopher!

Master Anna: So, I am Master Anna, and we were just talking about…

Hmm…

John is a little spaced out this afternoon and can’t think of what we were talking about, but it doesn’t matter. We were about to share a metaphor.

I am divinity!

I always have been divinity, and so have you!

Mmm…

So, I invite you to feel back through time.

Well, let’s just go beyond time. Step outside of time with me.

You see, your soul does not exist in time, except for the little part of it that is you the human. And that’s an illusion, because there ultimately is no time.

So, let’s go back to the beginning of experience.

There you were, pure consciousness.

Mmm…

Just feel that for a moment.

You are just aware, conscious.

You don’t know anything, because there isn’t anything to know.

It’s just consciousness.

You become aware that you are aware. And you ask the question, “But, who am I? Who am I that is aware?”

Well, in that moment, because the nature of consciousness is that there cannot be a question unless there is also an answer, so in that moment there came to be this mirror image of you.

You found yourself looking in your own eyes.

Mmm…

You found yourself… Oh, it was like another being in front of you, even though it was you. And this beautiful being said to you, “I am the answer to your question, and I am going to show you, in every way I possibly can, who you are. Who I am. Who we, together, are.”

Hmm…

And in that moment, that part of you went out.

Oh, we’re using human words here, and they don’t really work. But feel into the metaphor. Let go of the literal meanings of the words, and feel into the metaphor.

This part of you went out.

You could call it the masculine part, and that metaphor fits very well.

You could call it the you that, in a sense, stayed behind. The feminine part.

But the metaphor only goes so far, so let’s let it go. Let’s go beyond the whole masculine and feminine thing, because you are you. You are a whole being. You are neither feminine nor masculine, and you are both. And you are all. So let’s go beyond that.

You could say that one was the dark and one was the light. The one that went out was the light, the part of you that stayed behind was the dark, in a sense. Again, human metaphors can only go so far, so let’s go beyond that.

Hmm…

So this part of you went out and began to have experiences, and a part of you stayed behind. Oh, wherever “behind” was. It wasn’t a place.

At that point there wasn’t even any place to go out to, but there was an experience of separation. Of you becoming two. Of one of you going out into experience.

Oh, we experienced many, many things, and it was rather traumatic. Perhaps the most traumatic experience you’ve ever had, this separation from self, from home.

And you discovered that there was so much of you to discover, it felt like you were torn into billions of pieces as you began to walk through all these different experiences of who you are.

Mmm…

It’s a very long story.

As you went out, you began to create.

You began to sense other beings who were doing the same thing, and you created this communications network so that… Oh, we’ve spoken of it as the song. You could hear the song of them, and they could hear your song. And you created this network so that you could communicate.

You began creating. That creation went into your song and the others felt it, and tried it. And pretty soon you started creating this shared reality that you call mass-consciousness.

Oh, that was long before Earth was even thought of, or humans. You were what they call angels.

So you went through all these experiences.

Hmm…

Meanwhile, this other part of you was back home. Oh, it’s not a place.

It was in the background, collecting these experiences. Collecting the essence of them and distilling the wisdom from them.

And the moment you separated from yourself there was this tension between you that, you could say—and we will be bold enough to say—that tension became the energy with which you create all manner of experiences and things and oh, everything that you know, all the way down to this precious human.

Hmm…

So, this part of you went on this long, long journey to show you, dear Soul, who you are in every way possible.

Well, at some point, Earth was created. We won’t go to all the stories right now, but Earth was created and you compressed yourself down into the human. You slowed everything down and went through all these such intense experiences. You made it so real, so intense, so beautiful, and at times so ugly.

And all of it is another experience of you, of who you are. You include all of that.

Now, all of this was happening—oh, you think of space and time and vast distances, but none of that is real. Every bit of this has been happening inside your own awareness.

For lack of a better word we’ll call it, inside your own imagination.

So you have never actually gone anywhere, because it is all inside your own imagination.

You have been imagining all of this!

Oh, you even imagine the communications network. Even though it’s so real and it connects you to these others, like a computer game that connects through the internet to the games running on computers all over the world.

You connected through your song with all of these others, and through a great deal of trial and error and figuring it out and evolution as your awareness expanded, you evolved and you developed this thing called mass-consciousness, which helped you to create something that seems like a physical universe, a physical earth, a physical body, etc. Ah, but it’s really just energy, held in shape by your consciousness, by your imagination. That’s all it is!

So you walked through all of these experiences, a lot of experiences you never expected, answering that question of, Who am I?

And now, here you are. You have answered the question. There isn’t very much left, if anything at all, that needs to be answered, so here you are.

The journey is over.

You are coming back to self.

Mmm…

Feel yourself now.

You the human.

You, the one who has been out on this journey.

Feel yourself coming home, coming up to this one that, in a sense, you left behind so long ago.

You created this vast separation. It was only within your awareness, but it felt real.

Now here you are, and you are looking in the eyes of your soul.

It’s not better than you.

It’s just this part of you that has been back here at home, collecting the essence of your experiences and collecting the wisdom from them.

And being your tether, in a sense, that kept you from getting completely lost.

Here you are.

Feel yourself as you approach this, oh, it seems like another being.

Feel her welcome.

Feel…

Feel your own insecurity.

Feel your own fear as you approach this seemingly other being that you know is you.

All the fear.

You’ve been through so many traumatic experiences, and you’re not sure you did it right. You felt like you got so many of them wrong.

Feel the fear, the shame.

You are afraid to approach this being, your own soul.

Let yourself feel that.

.

Now, look in the eyes of this being.

.

This is your divinity.

Look in its eyes.

It might feel feminine to you, or masculine, or neither. It doesn’t matter.

Look in its eyes.

Feel the love.

Feel the gratitude.

You see, your soul has no judgments of you.

Your soul just has so much gratitude, because you have brought it so much!

You truly cannot even imagine how much you have brought to your soul, and how valuable it is!

Allow yourself to feel that.

.

Allow yourself to come closer.

.

Allow yourself to open your arms, to request a hug.

Because this is you. This is your home, and it’s time.

It is time for the reunion.

.

Allow this being, your own soul, your own divinity, to hug you.

.

Allow, within your feelings,  within your imagination, allow yourself to blend into this being, to blend together.

To come back to wholeness.

You and soul, human and divine, together as one whole being.

.

Mmm…

Listen, as your soul expresses its gratitude.

.

Ahh…

But you still have a body, a body that’s living on this planet called Earth.

In the past the only time you could get anywhere close to this grand being that is you, was when your body died. And even then your journey wasn’t complete yet, so you couldn’t really go back.

Now, you still have that body. And you have you.

Mmm…

You can let the body go now, if you want to. But that’s probably not what either you or your soul wants.

You see, your soul has been in the distance for so long. It could collect the essence of your experiences and distill the wisdom from them, but it could not be in the experiences with you. And now it can.

Because now, as you bring your attention back here to your human self, Soul comes with you. This grand, incredible being, comes with you. It comes into this body with you.

Mmm…

Remember, we are speaking in human words, which don’t come anywhere close to reality. But we do the best we can.

You and your soul ARE reunited.

It is done.

It’s a done deal!

It’s over!

Now you are simply getting used to each other again, like people who have been apart for a long time and they come back together. It takes a little getting used to each other, because you are very different than you were back then when you left. You have grown so much!

You are a grand being in your own right, and as you blend back together with your soul, oh, there are no words to describe you.

You find that the other angels, the ones who haven’t been to Earth yet, they see you and they bow to you. Because the colors and the energies that you carry, from all of this experience, is so incredible!

Mmm…

So now, oh, this is the receiving!

This is what receiving is all about: receiving you. Receiving all that you are, blended together.

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As you bring your awareness back into this body, feel your soul coming with you.

This grand being that you are, feel it coming with you.

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If you don’t feel anything, just imagine it. You know it’s real.

.

Feel how the separation will never happen again. It’s over.

Soul is here.

Divinity is here.

It is who you are.

Hmm…

And now, as you go forward in your life you will not be alone, for it will be as a whole, sovereign, grand creator being!

It will take some time to get through the ‘getting to know each other’ part, and learning how to deal with life from this place.

Mmm…

Oh, so many of you are having trouble with your bodies. You’re having trouble with your finances. You’re having trouble with all these things in life.

It is because you are not a human anymore.

You are not the person you were, just a very short time ago.

You are a God walking on Earth.

Hmm…

We don’t like that word too much, but it conveys a certain meaning that there isn’t any other way to convey.

Oh, but you have wisdom. You understand, at this point, that God has no power. God does not control life. God simply walks through creation, and experiences it. And as she does, creation blossoms around her.

Or him, it doesn’t matter. But the feminine applies a little bit more here.

God simply walks through creation and discovers what was created, in all its colors, in all its messiness, in all its beauty and all of its ugliness, in all of its pain and all of its pleasure. All of this is your creation.

All of this is who you are.

And now that you know that, you can let go of the struggle. You can let go of the suffering.

Just because your body hurts doesn’t mean you have to suffer. It’s just another sensation, and if you just be with it, just observe it, instead of fighting it or letting the fear that there’s some terrible thing wrong take you over, it won’t hurt as bad.

You will find that everything else in your life just takes care of itself. Not always the way the human expects, or thinks it should, but in ways that, in hindsight, you will see are so much better.

Mmm…

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I am divinity!

And maybe now you have a little sense of what that means.

It means that you are, indeed, truly, God walking on Earth!

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As you go forward in your life, allow yourself to remember that.

Oh, the human forgets very easily, especially big concepts like that, but it’s going to start coming back to you very quickly. Allow yourself to feel it.

I am God also.

Mmm…

I am divinity.

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Ahh…

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So, welcome once again to our new class! We only have a few people right now, but we expect there are going to be more and more joining in. Because this is profound.

It is the most profound thing that has ever happened in all of experience.

Hmmm…

Human and soul, human and divine, coming back together and walking around on Earth.

Mmm…

Feel it.

Stand tall!

Because indeed, you are among the grandest beings who have ever existed!

You can accept the honor of all the others, because you know that you are not going to take power over them. You are not better than them. You just have more experience than they have, and like anything in life the more experience you gain, the more real experience, the more you realize that it’s there for everybody. It doesn’t make you better, it just makes you wiser for yourself.

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Mmm…

So, let’s shift gears a little bit.

Is there anything that either of you have to say or ask or share at this point?

We remind the people listening in that there is a forum on the class page where you can submit questions or sharing that we will include in the next session, so you can be part of this too. And there is also a Facebook group that you can join if you want to.

Chris: Did you have anything you wanted to add, Monica? Otherwise I’ll share a little bit.

Monica: You’re very welcome to share.

Chris: Sure. Thank you.

The feeling I’m having as you are sharing all of this… I’m feeling so much guilt leaving my system. What we’re about to experience in such an integrated state, we can’t do that while we’re feeling guilty for all of these experiences. And it’s just washing over me in layers, that I’ve been living my entire life thinking I’ve been doing something wrong with every experience I’ve had.

And it’s so freeing to be feeling these energies and this, almost, this state of Eden. That’s what it feels like, particularly when you were sharing just then. It’s like remembering Eden, and we are bringing it back here to ourselves. And just the freedom of being innocent again.

All those experiences, none of them were wrong.

You can say that as many times as you want, right? But it’s a really big one to accept for me. That’s currently flowing through my experience, and it was coming up a lot as you were just sharing.

So, thank you so much for all of that.

Master Anna: You’re welcome! And we would like to add one thing here:

This idea that you can’t have this reunion as long as you have all of that guilt and shame has a certain amount of truth to it, but it is also a misunderstanding.

Chris: Okay.

Master Anna: Because you can, if you let it. The problem is that the guilt and shame makes you want to run away and hide.

But you can stop, and allow yourself to come home anyway, and to let in this amazing, beautiful part of you. It will take the guilt and shame. The guilt and shame will simply disappear.

So that’s part of it.

You do not have to do anything to be able to receive you.

Guilt and shame makes it hard for you to open up to that, but not impossible. So you focus on opening up to you.

Let the guilt and shame take care of itself, as it already is. As you know it is. And as you open to this incredible reunion, that will dissolve the guilt and shame away.

Chris: Mmm, thank you. Thank you. 

Monica: This was now, also for me, very profound to hear. Because also in me are parts that I’m not letting to be myself, to allow this grandness, because there is still a part who means, “I have to solve this!” [laughter] But I had tears the whole time. It was for me most beautiful words, Master Anna.

I’m feeling like an ice cube melting in the sun. It was like I heard it for the first time, really deeply clear. It was in me like, in the beginning, wow, wow! And I felt I did not know who is watching in whose eyes. Is the human watching in the soul’s eyes, or the soul into the human eyes? It was like upside down.

Master Anna: It’s both.

Monica: Yeah, it’s both. I could feel this sweetness, this melted honey sweetness, and it’s just without words.

And in parallel was the human tears also. What happened in Israel last week and has hit me totally. I can’t… By my human I don’t know why, but it just has hit me. And it was both the tears of this sweetness and the tears of a deep sadness, both in the same moment.

Master Anna: Indeed!

Mmm…

We would ask you, along with—it’s difficult for the human to do this, but you as divinity, as soul, you can understand why we would ask you to hold the people in this conflict, on all the different sides, hold them in honor.

Don’t go into blame, or who’s right or who’s wrong, for that totally misses the point, the real point.

These people, these beings, they are going through their experience of answering their own question of, Who am I?

And even to the extent that you see this conflict, it is showing you a part of who you are. So hold it in honor.

They will find their way through this, one way or another. There is very likely to be a lot more sadness on the part of the human until it gets resolved, but it is going through its resolution. Perhaps its final resolution, this conflict that goes so far back.

It’s been going on for a long time and it has been pushed under the rug a lot of times, so to speak. It has been hidden away, and then it comes back out again, and now it’s time for the resolution.

From the human standpoint it probably won’t be pretty, for a while. It’ll be messy and ugly and traumatic, but it’s all just an experience.

There is no death, for death is a total illusion.

There is ultimately not even any hurt. There is just experience. And from Soul’s perspective some of the most intense experiences are the most beautiful, because they take you the deepest.

And yes, feel what you feel inside you, because that is your experience. And that is taking you deeper into this reunion of you with you.

Monica:I could feel the first time my love, my deep love to this country, to these humans there.

I never could feel it so intense before. How much I love it, how much it means, or it meant, to me. It meant a lot to me, but I was not conscious about that.

Master Anna: Yes. Mmm…

It has meant a lot to pretty much everyone on this journey.

Certainly I spent many lifetimes there, and so have some of you, most of you. Or at least involved with things that were going on there.

So, nobody knows how it’s going to play out. There are many possibilities, and it will be interesting to see. But hold that compassion and that honor for everybody, on all the sides. And there are indeed multiple sides.

They are all just people, answering their own question of, Who am I?

“Well, I am this too.”

Monica: Thank you very much. It’s a great gift that we can speak about this.

Master Anna: Indeed.

Is there anything else?

Chris: After that channel, I feel like a kid getting ready for Christmas with this integration.

I just want to share that. I have a very specific feeling of the Christmas tree coming up, and it feels like home is seeping into the experience again at a really deep level. And the importance of joy, recently for me, has been a big one, because yes, as you mentioned, there’s still a lot of human stuff that we’re working out. Financial challenges, logistics, and what have you, right?

These things are all popping up, and the problem solver kicks in. And then the soul kicks in and says, “Chill! Just have fun, please! We are not going this far for things to totally fall apart. Just be joyful, and stay in that state as much as possible.”

Yeah. Thank you so much for everything you shared. That was really, really beautiful. I felt so much during that. Wow.

Monica: Yeah, me too, as never before. Really wonderful. Just beauty.

Chris: Yeah, I concur.

Master Anna:Mmm… Okay.

Well, it feels like that’s probably a good place to leave things for today.

Mmm…

Feel into that.

The recordings will be up as soon as I can do it.

Ahh…

Such an honor to be here with each of you! Those of here today, and the others who will come in and experience this later.

Ahh…

And so it is.

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Chris: Beautiful. Thank you so much, John.

Monica: Yeah, thank you so much, John.

Chris: Thank you so much for sharing, Monica.

Monica: Yeah. Wonderful. Thank you to you, Christopher. It’s really an honor being with you, both of you.

John: It’s my honor too, because it’s your energy too, your consciousness also, that brings the message through. So thank you, and we will be back in two weeks!

Monica: Thank you, looking forward. And have a wonderful workshop on the weekend. Enjoy it fully!

John: Thank you. Yes, it looks like it’ll only be the three of us, Romana and I and one other person that’s coming. But you know, I’m feeling it’s going to be really, really deep, so we’ll have a good time.

Monica: All the best to both of you.

John: All the best. Bye bye!

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