Divinity In Experience

Session 2

Channeled by John McCurdy during a live Zoom session on July 26, 2023

This transcript has been edited from the original recording to ensure that the intended meaning is conveyed as clearly as possible. Note that Hmm, Mmm, and lines with just a dot signify places to pause, and to feel into what is being said.

Thank you to Chris Vandermeer for preparing this transcript!

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John: Okay, well, it’s four o’clock here, so I guess it’s time to get started. There may be others who join in, or not. We’ll see. I think there are fourteen of us right now in the class, but a lot of them depend on the recordings and the transcripts because they can’t make it for the live session. So, I’m glad you all made it!

I think everybody introduced themselves last time except for Lisa. Would you like to just say hello to everybody?

Lisa: Hi, everybody. My name is Lisa Stancoti. I live in New York City. I am an attorney here in New York, still working at a 3D job I would love to not be working at soon. So yeah, I’ve been a longtime Crimson Circle member and that’s how I met John and came through to John’s material, and here I am!

John: Welcome!

Lisa: Thank you.

John: Welcome, all of you. It has been quite a couple of weeks for me! A lot of dragon work, or integration work, or whatever you want to call it, but it’s been quite a week!

So, Chris, if you want to go ahead and play some music, we’ll breathe for a couple minutes and get started.

[music plays]

Master Anna: I am that I am!

Master Anna, of Magical Service!

Oh, Master John is here too. We are one and the same, except that I am more of the feminine facet of John’s soul.

Ahh…

We have some big things to deal with in this session, in these times, so we wanted a more feminine perspective, even as we speak through the very masculine human, called John. It brings a kind of balance.

Hmm…

So, welcome everybody!

Hm, we are going to change our view here for a moment. [a pause, as John adjusts his Zoom settings]

Ahh…

So, oh, John has had quite the dragon encounters this week! And we feel that some of you have also, so  we would love to hear how your week has been if you are willing to share. How has your experience of your divinity been in the past couple of weeks?

Lisa.

Lisa: The last couple of weeks have been a bit challenging. Some family issues surfacing. I’m still finding it difficult to navigate my new path and still be Lisa in her old life.

So, you know, if that’s part of the plan, it’s kind of like, you know, difficult to leave a life and then still be in the life. So, struggling with that, some family issues, my mom’s health issues, just challenges dealing with that. 

And I have a sort of… I got out of the flow. I was in a flow for a bit and then suddenly everything got choppy, and everything was going—my technology was going kerflooey on me—things just weren’t easy. I was meeting obstacles and challenges everywhere I turned.

So that’s been my last couple of weeks

Master Anna: Indeed. A question we would ask is, did you get out of the flow or did you just go through a choppy part of the river?

Lisa: I’d like to think the latter, because I’m always very aware that I hold the power to get back in the flow. But you know, we’re still human. We’re still here. We still have to deal with stuff. It’s not like, I mean, things are supposed to come easily to us, learning how to receive, but then we still have to deal with human life.

So I get frustrated by that, many times. I get baffled by it, not knowing how to deal with it or how to make it work. So I’d love to hear others’ views on that as well.

Master Anna: Indeed.

Anybody else?

Silvia.

Silvia: The first week, I think I have an experience where I guess it was my dragon doing. My child climbed to the roof! And my child has Autism and Down Syndrome, so I was so scared, so scared.

But I noticed that I was able to release, to release after—after I cried—I was able to release stuff that I was holding on for a long, long time ago. So it was needed.

Master Anna: Indeed.

Silvia:And the second week, I just noticed that I was still going back to old patterns, but I’m glad that I’m aware of them. Now, I can’t notice them. I’m just being aware of them, and then I let them flow, and then I go back to me.

But besides that, it was okay. All the week, all the two weeks, it was okay, and I’m still traveling in Mexico and having a good time.

Master Anna: Ahh…

So often, just that simple awareness of, “Oh, that’s an interesting pattern I’ve been playing out!” just that simple awareness is all it takes. Just to be aware, and then divinity does the rest.

Who else?

How has your experience of your divinity been this week, or the past week or two?

[a pause, waiting for questions or comments.]

Ahh…

You see, it’s all your divinity. Every bit of it. Everything you perceive. Everything in your life.

Hello, Monica! [Monica joins the call]

It’s all your divinity. It’s all your soul. It’s all your energy.

Mmm…

So often the human thinks—oh, we’ll speak for John—so often, the human thinks of divinity as this grand, beautiful, perfect, peaches-and-cream kind of thing. But this divinity, your light, is the stuff out of which all of your reality is made!

And now it is waking up within itself. Within you.

Hmm…

John is stumbling for words, but you feel it. You feel what we mean, if you let yourself.

Look around at your world, and that is you.

And indeed, the flow is not always smooth. It gets easier and easier to be in the flow, but you have to understand that sometimes the river goes through canyons, through gorges, through rapids, through all these rough places.

Sometimes it runs into a lake, and it feels like it’s going really slow for a while.

Sometimes it’s really fast!

Sometimes it’s just a pleasant ride.

The more you can just let it be what it is, then the smoother it is for you.

That doesn’t mean there are not going to be changes, or things that, to the old human, felt really rough.

But as you allow this flow and the changes that come with it, as you put down your paddle and let your boat just carry you, suddenly it all gets easy. Even when it seems kind of crazy, because you are just carried through it.

The changes, they happen. They come and they go. Things go out of your life. Things come into your life. And you don’t have to figure it out anymore. You just be with it. You allow the experience, whatever it is.

And indeed, pieces of the old human life may stay around, or they may not. But as your divinity opens within you, you are truly a different person. A new being.

Hmm…

And that makes a lot of things kind of crazy, or at least feel crazy.

Like we talked last week, or two weeks ago, everything you see around you, from the human perspective, is mass consciousness, and you have chosen to release mass consciousness.

Which means that all of that stuff has to change.

Oh, you are still staying in the game, in a certain way, and yet it is all changing, also, as the game begins to conform to your consciousness instead of everybody else’s.

You will find some of those things that have to do with everybody else, falling away. And you will find new things coming in that are for you, and new people coming into your life that are for you. New sources of income, new ways of living.

Hmm…

It can make the human a little crazy. But if you can relax and breathe through it, and let it happen, then all that roughness actually gets pretty easy. Something our human, John, has learned through a lot of challenging experience. And beautiful experience!

Ahh…

So, we have some questions that were sent in, and we’ll ask Chris to read them for us. Start with the first one.

Chris: Okay, question one:

“It’s been mentioned so often, that the light brings up hidden things. – Well, after all the years of releasing, and integrating, and… and… and… – it feels like “oh no, not again!!” It seems a never-ending-story. It feels as if the human in this incarnation is like that ass, with a carrot dangling in front of its nose, making it go on, and on, and on… – Isn’t it the job of those other lifetimes, when they feel the light coming from this incarnation, to go through this / allow their stuff to be released? – Patience?!? – Ha! My human has no patience any more!!!

And all the talk of guilt and shame! Geeze!! The human in this incarnation has done quite enough, allowed more than its share.

Are you sure that John (the human) got this right? That it isn’t a nasty aspect of his, riding its “guilt-and-shame hobby” so well he can’t really feel what Master John is trying to tell him? – This last part may sound like a joke, but I’m quite serious about it. – And please don’t tell me to breathe in this impatience; I need something more…. – hmmm, “tangible” / “hands-on” (YES, I did breathe in the human-need-to-do-something!).

Looking forward to light in this question – Thank you.”

Master Anna: Well, indeed.

No, we are very sure this isn’t just human John’s hobby.

The whole thing of the shame, that is what we are doing right now. That’s why the dragon is here right now.

Hmm…

And if you don’t like the word shame, we asked John to do a quick search before we started, for synonyms for the word, and he came up with a whole bunch of them: Humiliation, regret, mortification, chagrin, embarrassment, indignity, discomfort, pity, misfortune, confused, contempt, remorse, irritation. Those are all at the top of the list of synonyms for shame. So if you are feeling any of those things, well, then you are feeling shame. Because shame is at the root of, we would say, pretty much all of what you call the negative emotions. They all go back into that core shame.

It’s a shame, oh, not just from your lifetimes. It’s a shame that goes back to the wounds of Isis and Adam, and everything that has come after that. It goes all the way back to the a wall of fire, to that horrible feeling you had of having lost home. Of having—oh, you must have done something terrible to have lost home!

That’s the original shame, and it’s deep. And it’s intense. And yes, it’s coming up in so many different ways right now. It’s coming up for release.

And releasing it is not the human’s job. It is the soul’s job.

But you have to let it happen.

You are going to feel a lot of things, a lot of these feelings, while it is happening. And those other aspects, yes, they are releasing in their own way. But you, you are the designated ascendee! You are the one through whom all of this is being allowed to release.

And yes, it affects your life. It affects how you feel. It’s difficult at times.

So, let’s talk about that donkey and the carrot a little bit.

You see, that carrot represents the future. It is all about the future. So, we ask you, why are you still chasing it?

It’s not our carrot. It’s not Adamus’ carrot, or Tobias’ carrot, or anyone else’s. It’s yours, so why are you still chasing it off into the future?

Always, always it’s ahead of you, somewhere in the future.

The solution is to come back to NOW.

Mmm…

There is another part of the fable of the donkey and the carrot, and it is the stick. There is a carrot dangling in front of the ass’s nose, and there is the stick hitting it in the behind, driving it forward. That’s the shame.

That is this feeling that you have to accomplish something, that you have to get somewhere, and somehow everything—the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence, as they say.

So, why do you chase it?

Why not come back to now?

Why not come back into this moment and just stop, and BE in the experience of now?

Oh, the human doesn’t like that. Sometimes the now experience hurts. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable, challenging, confusing, and all these things, so the human goes running off after that carrot again, after something better. A better human life.

And that is not why we are here right now.

We are here right now to have an experience. And in allowing the present experience, then soul, and divinity, takes care of everything else.

And then you find that you don’t need to chase that carrot anymore, and nobody can beat you on the behind with that stick anymore, because you are living in a different reality. A reality that looks very much like the reality you’re used to, and is also totally different.

Then your experience begins to change also, and it begins to get easier.

Hmm…

It’s still confusing at times, when the mind tries to figure it out. And it’s the mind that created that carrot, and it is the mind that goes chasing after it. And that’s when you have to say, “Dear mind, stop it! No more! No more chasing that carrot! Come, be here. Be still, with me.”

Hmm…

Next question, Chris.

Chris: Question two:

“For months I have been dealing with various symptoms on a daily basis – physical, but also emotional which range from mild to extreme. I am aware that the integration is an intensive process and I allow this process or rather I let it happen. Breathe with it etc.

Lately the symptoms have been extremely brutal and so I am asking if there is anything I can do to help overcome this? It feels partly as if I would explode internally, more and more often I feel that it cuts off my throat, constant dizziness and other symptoms always occur together. It always goes to the limit of the bearable and this limit seems to expand again and again.

Thank you for your insights Master John.”

Master Anna: Hmm…

First, we need to acknowledge that, at least in this incarnation that you see in front of you as John, we are not a medical doctor, so we are not providing any kind of medical advice. But maybe we can provide a little bit of awareness, and then you use your discernment.

And, if you feel the need to go to a doctor and see what’s happening, there is no shame in that.

Hmm…

And we’ve talked in the past about some of John’s body issues, and for the most part he avoids the doctor, but that’s his choice. That is our choice, for John.

You, feel with your soul what is appropriate for you. And if you feel to go to the doctor, do it. And if you don’t, then come into the experience.

This is not something to be conquered. This is something to be experienced.

And as you said, it sometimes pushes you right to the edge, as it does John sometimes. But it never pushes you beyond the edge. So be in the experience.

The really important thing here is, be in communion with your soul, with your divinity.

Mmm…

You, dear one, might want to check out the intuition class that we did last month. But the most important thing here is to be in communion with your soul. To feel—oh, your soul doesn’t usually communicate with you in words.

Even us, we are providing feelings to John, and his brain is doing its best to translate them into words. Sometimes it works better than others. Sometimes we don’t get it quite right, but together we’re doing the best we can.

So, open up to your soul. That’s where you will find the answers that you need for what to do now. In the feelings. In the little nudges.

And if you’re not sure, be in the experience. Breathe the experience in, all of it.

Don’t try to conquer it. Don’t try to get over it.

Breathe it in.

Be with it.

Mmm…

And you will know, in the moment, if there is something you need to do. And it will pass, eventually, when it is the right time.

Right now, it is there because it is serving you. It is serving you somehow. And we don’t mean that as a judgment. What we mean by that is simply that the experience is not finished yet.

When John first heard Adamus say, “If there’s something in your life that you don’t like it’s because you actually do like it, because it’s serving you somehow,” John took it as a judgment.

He was looking inside himself and asking, “But what is it that I’m holding on to here, and how do I let it go?”

Well, now he knows that’s a useless question. The simple fact is, it’s here. It’s not to be conquered. It’s not to be gotten rid of. It is to be experienced, to be breathed in, to be welcomed.

Oh, and as in the experience of integration we did a few weeks ago, it is to give it a hug. To welcome it.

But don’t fix it. Don’t try to get rid of it.

Just be in the experience, as hard as it is sometimes, and it will change. It will pass.

There was a while where John’s feet hurt so bad. Every time he’d lay down and try to go to bed, his feet would hurt so bad! Well, they’re still bothering him a bit, but that’s shifting. It’s fading.

The experience is coming to its completion. And it will for you also, if you let it.

If you fight it, if you try to fix it, if you… Hm, that doesn’t mean don’t go to the doctor if you feel like going to the doctor, but don’t fight it. Don’t fight the experience.

It also doesn’t mean don’t take medication or pain pills if you feel the need to. Trust yourself. Trust the flow. Trust the process as it unfolds from moment to moment, and it will complete in the perfect timing.

It is not for you to complete it. It is for you to let it happen.

Your soul is handling it. Your divinity is handling it.

And in this pain, in this process, whatever it is you are feeling, you are integrating so much. You are releasing so much of that old shame, and all those old feelings that go with it.

Hmm…

So be with it. And be with your soul. Open to communion with your soul.

And again,  we will suggest the class that we did recently on intuition, to aid you in that process of opening to your soul.

So, next question.

Chris:Okay, this is a sharing.

“A couple experiences and insights I’d like to share: For months my body has been quite tense, and it usually was difficult to fall asleep. Recently it dawned on me, that it has to do with very old incarnations, living in the wild, always having to be alert, to not be eaten by wild animals. I talked to my body about it and explained, that it was safe now, and could relax – and it did. What a relief!

These past few weeks my whole body has been sort of tingling (like it does after being numb from cold and then is warming up). Well, this time it’s not from the usual cold, but thawing (so to speak), because of the light coming in. – And about this also, I talk to my body, and explain what is happening. – Talking to my body has always helped me in the past, even long before I knew anything about Enlightenment, and never more than now.

I imagine that the body pains are not all due to unresolved issues, in the dark space between the cells, but that it simply needs time to adjust to the luminosity of the new levels of light coming in.

I welcome any additional insights or comments to this, and would like to hear about others’ experiences. – Thank you.”

Master Anna: Indeed, we couldn’t have said it better ourselves!

And indeed, there is so much happening right now.

Hmm…

Some of you are familiar with software. In open source software there is what is called “forking” it, where you take a copy of a program—it’s open source so you can do whatever you want with it—and you begin to make it your own. You separate it from the main branch of the software and you start making it your own, and that is called making a fork of it.

That is what you are doing right now with mass consciousness, in a sense. Our metaphors are not perfect, but you are taking your copy of mass consciousness—and indeed, it is yours. It is your creation.

Even though you created it according to the song of the masses, you could say, it is still your creation. Everything in your experience is all yours, created according to that pattern.

Well, now you are changing it. You are changing the pattern and making it your own, and so it’s going to be painful at times. It’s going to be filled with turmoil at times, as the old stops working and is replaced with the new.

Hmm…

We love the metaphor that Adamus used one time, of taking an old sports car, or an old clunker car, and driving down the road as fast as it will go, and all of a sudden it starts rebuilding itself. While you are still moving, it starts falling apart and being rebuilt until it turns into this super high performance jet airplane. And it’s all happening while you are going down the road.

It makes for a rough ride at times, but that’s what is happening.

Mmm…

So, are there any other experiences that you would like to share, or any questions?

Lisa.

Lisa: So, I don’t know if anybody here is part of Keahak. I don’t know if it’s permissible to even talk about it, John, but…

Master Anna: You can always share your experience.

Lisa:Okay.

Master Anna: And I am familiar with it. We were in Keahak up until, well, we’re not in this year, but we were for the last two or three. And we were in the first one.

Lisa:Okay. Well this is Keahak 13 now, I think and Adamus gave everybody an assignment of which, in the first session, was to go buy yourself something.

And in the second session, which was just last week, he basically chastised a lot of people for not doing that, for not going out and buying themselves something and gifting themselves with something.

And I was among those people who procrastinated about it, because I don’t really need anything. I have money to buy myself whatever I want, but I just don’t want anything. I wasn’t inspired to go out and do anything. So I kind of sat on it, admittedly.

And he lambasted everybody over that, and I had a pretty intense reaction to that. I was in a rage over it because, much like the first question that was asked, about, you know, there’s always something we’re not doing right… Now we finally got through Heaven’s Cross, we did that, we pushed through all of that energy, we made that happen, and now here we are. I thought we were in Ease and Graceville, right? Everything’s going to come easy!

And then all of a sudden, now go out and do something and buy something for yourself, and if I don’t do it, now I get yelled at.

So it’s just—I had some sort of like a really angry reaction to that. And, you know, I simmered, frankly, for like two or three days over it. But, you know, I had to sit back and say, well, what is that about? I mean, if it’s not there, if the energy is not there…

And frankly, I did end up going out that day of the session and buying myself a ring, that I didn’t want, but I liked it, so I went with it. But it felt like a homework assignment that I had to do, that I didn’t really want to do. But that was the energy of how I experienced it, which didn’t feel right to me.

So anyway, I just bring that up because, you know, these mixed messages, the paradoxes, you know, it’s let it happen, allow, now we’re into “receive.” Now we’ve heard “allow” for years and years and years, and now we’ve got to receive, and now we’re not receiving right.

So it’s just, it brought something up for me and I’m just wondering if you could speak a little bit to that. I mean, it’s probably nothing new in terms of, you know, allowing these experiences to just be what they are and unfold. But I frankly did think this was a time that things were going to get easier, and they’re not feeling too….the way I thought they would. Over and out.

Master Anna: Indeed.

As for Adamus, it’s good to remember that he is us. Focused perhaps by Saint Germain, but he is us. And a lot of times he pushes us in ways to…

In this case, we feel two motivations in that particular assignment. One is to get you to gift yourself something, to honor yourself with some kind of gift, but it’s up to you what that gift is. And he may couch it in a particular way, and part of that is because he wants you to feel what you just felt and tp say, Wait a minute, this isn’t about Adamus. This is about me. What is the gift I can give myself?

And maybe that gift is to say, You know what, I don’t need to buy anything, because I have everything I need. Maybe it is to honor myself enough to say, ‘You know, fuck off, Adamus. I’m honoring me in the way I know how!’

And that will make him really happy, even if he yells at most of the people that were just lazy, or that are still such followers that they feel guilty because they didn’t do exactly what he said. And he’ll push them on that, until they get pissed off enough to either leave, or to come back to themselves and say, You know what, I’m going to do it my way! Because that’s what this is all about.

Hmm…

It’s about coming home to the self.

I decide!

I am the captain of my ship, and I decide where this ship goes!

Oh, the human mind tends to jump in there and come up with all these plans and ideas about where the ship should go, and that’s where you have to step back and say, “Wait a minute, I am a soul, and as Soul, I am the captain of my ship.”

The mind is just one of the crew. It might even be the first officer, but I, as Soul, I am the captain of my ship. I decide, but from a whole different place.

Then you just feel into, What feels good to me, right now?

And don’t worry about what Adamus says. He’s got a lot of really good insights, but the bottom line of all of this is coming back to self. What do I choose?

And that’s what will make Adamus really happy.

As far as Heavens Cross, yes, it was—it is—a big deal. A huge, huge, huge opening!

Of course the human has lots of expectations about what that looks like and what it means, and how everything should get easier now. And it is, in a way. And in a way it’s very confusing, because it’s changing so much.

Any new step forward brings a lot of change, and that’s confusing. And when the mind gets involved in trying to figure that out and figure out what to do, well, then it gets difficult.

Just be in the experience. Be with what it is right now and trust what you feel in this moment. And if that is, I have everything I need and I don’t need to go buy anything, then take a look at the essence of the question, or of the suggestion. What is he really asking me to do? He’s asking me to honor myself.

Then do that in your own way, whatever that means to you.

Does that help?

Lisa: Yes. Thank you.

Master Anna: Ahh, you’re welcome.

Any other questions or experiences to share?

Silvia.

Silvia:Well, yesterday I was walking in my town where I was born and grew up, and I was, how I can say, after three years of not being there, and I was walking and then I find someone from my childhood and we shake hands and say hi and everything, but once I was leaving, I felt like, oh my God, all of this is my creation!

I was so excited and so happy, because all this little town is my own creation!

Even though I grew up there and everything, I just felt like, for the first time, an emotion that, “Oh, wow!” It’s like another feeling. It’s like being from another point of view. Totally different!

I was excited! I just want to share that.

Master Anna: Yeah, thank you!

Hmm…

It’s confusing for the mind to look around and see all of these things and all of these other people and know, That’s my creation!

And it is also so liberating.

Hmm…

It means that we can recreate it. And we are recreating it, in every moment.

But you have to leave that part to your soul, because the mind doesn’t know how. The mind doesn’t understand what it means even, or the process. So you say, Soul, let’s have fun here! I am going to be in whatever experience I find myself in and do my best to have a good time in it, or at least to just feel it.

That’s when Soul can step in.

When you’re not fighting it, when you’re just being in it, that’s when Soul can step in and start to change things. That’s when you might find yourself on an airplane with a one-way ticket to the other side of the world like John did five years ago, wondering what’s going to happen next.

Well, the next thing he knew, he was married to this amazing being, and he lives this beautiful life here!

Oh, it still has plenty of challenges, but that’s part of being human. Human life will always, always have challenges, because that’s what it means to be human. But pretty soon they’re not really challenges. They’re just experiences, and they pass. And they change.

Mmm…

Who else?

[pause to wait for comments]

Mmm…

So, let’s take a little journey.

Hmm…

A long time ago…

Hmm…

It was before time was even thought of. But we need time for a story, so we’ll just say:

A long time ago you asked yourself, Who am I?

Well, the nature of existence is that when you ask a question, the answer has to be there.

So when you asked that question, Who am I? Suddenly you found in front of you the mirror image of you.

Mmm…

That mirror image is what you call the masculine.

In a certain sense, but only a certain sense, in that moment you split into the feminine and the masculine.

And as you looked in his eyes—we’re not talking about men and women. This is for each of you, no matter what kind of body you have right now.

As you looked in his eyes, oh, you fell in love, in an explosion of passion!

Ahh…

You went into what you call the Wall of Fire.

And in that…

Oh, you knew—in the instant you saw each other you knew—that you wanted to experience who you are in every way possible.

So, in this explosion of passion, you exploded into oh, billions upon billions upon billions of fragments of you.

Hmm..

As you became aware again, you found yourself in the void.

And all around you, all these—oh, we’ll call them fragments, for the moment.

But remember, this is a metaphor. It is not to be taken as something literal, like you would take something physical. It’s not like that. It’s just a metaphor. We’re trying to paint a picture here, and it’s one you already know.

Mmm…

You had forgotten who you were.

Suddenly you felt this horror, this feeling of horror and of shame. What happened?

You forgot.

You forgot who you were.

All you could think of was, What happened? I must have done something really horrible to get thrown out of home!

Hmm…

And so you began your journey, of picking up all of these pieces of you and bringing them back home.

Oh, you thought you were trying to get back home. But in reality, you were home.

You were bringing all of these pieces home.

Hmm…

These pieces… Oh, in this explosion time was created, this illusion of time, so that you could walk through this process, so you could experience all of these different lifetimes and all of these different experiences.

Each one of those fragments was an experience of you.

Mmm…

And now, here you are.

It’s all coming back together now.

It’s hard for the human to see that, but it is all coming back together now.

Mmm…

Even the feminine and the masculine.

Oh, you’ve created so many experiences around that.

Beautiful experiences and horrible experiences, from the human standpoint.

But oh, from Soul’s standpoint, incredible experiences! From which so much wisdom has been distilled.

But here you are.

You came to Earth.

Ahh…

And along the way the feminine tried to fix everything, and it didn’t work. And she took on even more shame.

She asked Adam to take over, the masculine, but it wasn’t in his makeup to be able to inspire creation the way the feminine did.

So he tried, because he loved the feminine so much.

The driving passion for the masculine has always been to serve the feminine, and yet he only knew how to push things around.

Feminine knows how to inspire. The feminine was the original creator.

The mirror image was the masculine, who always wanted so much to serve the feminine. But everything he tried blew up in his face.

And he tried some very foolish things, you might say, along the way, because, well, he didn’t know anything different.

He wasn’t a creator like the feminine, so he tried to push things around and to control things, trying to do the job she asked him to do.

And everywhere he turned, it seemed like he made another mess.

Hmm…

Each of you have Adam and Isis, the feminine and the masculine, inside of you.

So you took on more shame, more feelings of failure, more humiliation.

Mmm…

Now you come to here.

Now, you have collected so many of those pieces.

So many more are coming home now.

You are feeling their feelings, and your mind is confused.

Mmm…

Adam is confused. The masculine is confused.

It’s not quite sure what’s happening right now.

So this is the time where you come back to yourself and you say, as your whole self; as your soul you say, Dear mind, dear masculine, take a breath. Be still.

I am in charge now. I am the captain of this ship, the whole me.

You have served me so well through all of these experiences, and now they are coming to completion.

Now I am releasing all of the shame. I don’t need it anymore.

I am letting it go.

.

Mmm..

And now you step up.

Oh, imagine it right now. See it in your imagination.

This grand, beautiful ship!

It’s you.

All these parts of you are your crew.

And they are in turmoil, because they haven’t had a leader for a long time.

They have had the first officer, you could say, trying to control them all this time, and they are mostly in rebellion because they haven’t had a leader.

So, now is the time for you to step up into the place of the captain.

Hmm…

And you speak, with authority in your voice:

Dear crew, be still. I am back. This is my ship.

You are a part of me, but you are not in charge. I am.

As a whole being, as soul, I am in charge. And I am here to take you on a new journey.

Dear mind, you are not going to understand right away, so I need you to be still. To trust me.

I need you all, all parts of me, to take your places in the ship, and to get ready, because we are going on a new and grand journey.

No more games.

No more battles among self, among the crew.

No more chasing after carrots.

Be here now.

Take your place in the ship, and let’s go have some fun!

Hmm…

Ahh…

When you look around, all of these members of your crew that were all battling each other and arguing about what they should do and where we should go, are all going back to their places.

They are all cheering!

You turn to the masculine, and he’s got a big grin on his face!

Because this is what he wanted all along. He wanted the feminine, the heart of Soul, to be back in her rightful place.

And as you take that place, dear feminine… And again, we are speaking to the feminine within each of you, no matter what kind of body you are in.

As you take that place, everything changes.

The ship begins to move on its own.

Mmm…

You look out, and you are no longer just sailing in the ocean.

You are sailing through the stars!

Hmm…

And the ship moves all by itself, because your crew is now all in harmony.

All of that shame has dissipated, because you have stepped up and taken your rightful place as the leader of your ship.

Mmm…

As the captain, as the commander, the director, and most of all the inspirer of your ship.

Mmm…

You see, that’s how you release shame.

As long as you are focused on the shame and on getting rid of, it just makes more.

But when you say, No more! I am not going to play that game anymore! and you step back into your rightful place as the captain of your ship…

Ahh…

The shame just disappears.

Hmm…

Yes, you may find yourself floating down some wild rivers along the way, or wild currents between the stars. It’s all up to you now, and it will be easy.

It will be so easy!

Hmm…

You have to let go of your human agendas because, well, they come from the shame.

They come from Adam.

They come from the masculine, trying to figure everything out and trying to push everything around. And they just get in the way.

Mmm…

But you, dear Soul, dear divine feminine self, take your rightful place.

Be the inspirer.

Oh, a ship is no democracy. A ship is no committee.

No, this is your ship. You decide.

But it’s not a mental decision, except to let it happen.

Except to acknowledge Soul, to acknowledge the divine feminine.

To acknowledge your own self as a grand creator.

Hmm…

And then everything else gets clear.

Mmm…

Oh, feel yourself on this ship.

.

Don’t look for images to come in from the outside, just imagine it.

.

Imagine the feminine facet of you standing in the captain’s place on this ship, bringing her heart to inspire the whole crew.

Hmm…

That’s where you find your divinity.

That’s what is happening right now.

You don’t need to do anything to make it happen.

Just allow it.

Open to it.

Imagine it.

Let it take you where it takes you, and you will be amazed.

Hmm…

Yes, things may fall away in your life.

You may get separated out from that old human path.

Whatever it is, you may find it crumbling away, or being ripped away if you’re holding on too much.

But you are going to find your life changing in ways you can’t even imagine!

You are going to find yourself soaring. And it won’t matter how rough the river is, because, well, your soul is carrying you.

This amazing ship, that’s what it is.

It’s carrying you, and it’s soaring through the stars, through your Earth, through your human life. You’ll find yourself soaring.

It takes some time, but it is happening.

Ahh…

So, with that, we’ll see you again next time.

John can’t remember if that’s two weeks or three weeks from now, but it’s on the website.

We’ll have the recordings up as soon as we can, and the transcript.

Ahh…

Until then, feel the ship.

Talk to this ship.

Be the captain.

Be the inspirer!

And so it is.

.

John: Ahh…

Thank you everybody, for being here!

[participants thank John and say their goodbyes]

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