Divinity In Experience

Session 4

Channeled by John McCurdy during a live Zoom session on August 23, 2023

This transcript has been edited from the original recording to ensure that the intended meaning is conveyed as clearly as possible. Note that Hmm, Mmm, and lines with just a dot signify places to pause, and to feel into what is being said.

Thank you to Chris Vandermeer for preparing this transcript!

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John: So, let’s get started!

Greetings everybody, including the ones that aren’t here live with us and will be coming in later.

And Chris, why don’t you play the music and we’ll see where we go.

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[music plays]

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I am that I am!

Master Anna of Magical Service.

Ah, John still gets a little teary when he feels me coming in. But I’m so happy to be here in my, oh, how should we say it? My true form.

Oh, the words don’t really work but, ahh, so happy to be here.

Mmm…

Now Master John is, oh, it’s me. But I really like the balance of coming in as the feminine and speaking through a masculine body that is also me.

So, welcome! Welcome to this fourth session of Divinity In Experience.

We’ll have a little bit longer break—I believe there are three weeks between this session and our next one, just because of the way the calendar works, until the second Wednesday of September.

So, ah, what a time this is! What a week it has been for so many of you! I think for all of you, and certainly for John and I and Romana, and everyone in this class.

Mmm…

So, let’s begin.

Chris, if you would read that first question.

Chris:Sure, the first question we have, I don’t have a name for it, but it starts off with:

5 months since Heaven’s Cross!

Hmmm, I’m not even sure if I feel or experience anything different than before, or if I have any questions. Does anybody have anything to share? Are there any insights from any of you, and from Master John & Anna?

Thank you for any contributions.

Master Anna: Ah, indeed.

And dear one who asked the question, we happen to know that you are feeling quite a bit different. Oh, you’re not too happy about that! But it is part of this process.

So, we’ll put it out to those present here right now. How is your experience since Heaven’s Cross, since we’ve begun this class?

Lisa.

Lisa: Okay. So, on the one hand, I can actually understand where the questioner is coming from. On the other hand, I definitely feel different. But I think if I can try to—and I’m putting my intellectual brain on this—but the way I can best describe this is that the shifts that are occurring in us are so deep within us.

We feel it, but nothing on the outside has changed yet, so we can’t marry these experiences yet. We can’t marry who we are with the external yet, so we’re all in that transition mode still.

And, you know, it begs the question, are we ever going to get out of transition?

I mean, that’s a question I have for you, Master Anna!

Master Anna: Ah, if only…

If only you could see from our perspective, how very quickly this is happening! We know it doesn’t feel that way to the human.

You have this interesting thing called time, but it is happening so fast!

Lisa: What is happening so fast? Can you elaborate on that?

Master Anna: The integration of all that you are.

Oh, you’ve heard that so many times that it sounds a little trite, but it’s so big!

It’s so big!

Ahh…

The reuniting of the feminine and the masculine within you, in a way that you haven’t even imagined yet.

Oh, we’re going to be talking a lot more about that in the future. But it’s big!

The stepping out of mass-consciousness.

Oh, you look around at the world around you, at the people around you, at everything that you can perceive with your human senses, and that is all mass-consciousness!

It’s your imagination, your soul’s imagination, but it is conforming to a pattern in order to create a shared experience with everyone else.

Well, you are stepping out of that pattern, and that is why things feel so crazy at times. Because the very nature of your human reality is changing. It’s losing its ground, you could say. It’s losing its structure. And that makes the human, which itself is part of mass-consciousness, a little (or a lot!) crazy.

It feels disturbing. It feels depressing at times, because you have your human ideas of how things should be and it doesn’t quite work that way. And then you feel like you are failing, or like you should be doing something different, or like there’s something you’re not getting, and none of that is true. You are getting it, and that is why it feels so weird.

So, who else has something you’d like to share about your own experience of this transition?

Silvia.

Silvia:Since Heaven’s Cross, my human part hasn’t felt anything different since then. Everything is the same.

But she just realized that she feels guilty. Guilty because the life that she is living is so wonderful, full of love, full of abundance, full of family, full of everything, and that’s the hard part for her, to let that go.

Master Anna: Mmm… Why does she feel guilty?

Silvia: Guilty to feel abundance.  Because everyone around her is not. And also, she’s been feeling this week the need for more air.

Master Anna: More air in what way?

Silvia: Asphyxiating. She feels a need to be outside, in the openness, to feel the breeze, to feel the air. I am happy about it because she never felt that before. Now she’s noticing, she’s noticing the air, she’s noticing her surroundings. And she’s connected.

Master Anna: Indeed, and that is part of what is happening. You are becoming more sensitive. You are bringing in your soul’s senses, and you are feeling so much more.

Silvia: Exactly. That’s what she’s feeling. She’s missing a lot.

Master Anna: I’d like to come back again, for a minute, to the guilt. I’d like you to tell us the real truth of that, of the difference between you, and these others that maybe don’t have the same abundance that you do.

Silvia: The difference is that, kind of, she was hiding her light. She didn’t want anyone to see it. And she was kind of like, in a way, she wasn’t being completely as she should. And she just discovered that she’s guilty of that. But now she is letting it be bright. Her light is brightening. Now she discovered that she is not guilty. She shouldn’t be. It’s just a natural way to be.

Master Anna: Indeed. It is just a more conscious way to be.

You have opened up. You’ve let it in.

The others, it’s their creation. They are just as, oh, for lack of a better word, just as powerful a creator as you, but they are creating according to an old pattern. And we are going to talk more about that today.

Silvia: Exactly. Old patterns of her childhood. Like she needs to be hiding. That her love, her brightness that she didn’t let anyone else to see it, and for that reason she caused a lot of concerns around her family. Family, when getting away from her, because she was so loving to anyone. But they were afraid of the love that she was showing to everyone else.

Master Anna: Okay, let’s move on for the moment. We will be coming back to this.

Welcome, Monica!

We have put out the question, how has your experience been since Heaven’s Cross? And also, since we started this class? What is your experience of this incredible time and transformation?

And you can answer that now, or maybe Chris wants to say something about it.

Chris: Yeah, I was just going to say that I understand why it feels like it’s taking so long. Because if you think about some of the patterns that we’re still playing around in, they are so incompatible with what we really are. And for me, I feel… Yeah, in my personal experience I feel like there is almost like a full dam of Divinity just behind me, and there’s just all the necessary ground work being done to get ready to open it.

Because there are certain things that they just can’t be there. It’s too much energy, it’s too much…Yeah, it’s too much energy. These imbalances of the human, they can’t be there anymore. It would just, like, I don’t even know what would happen, you know. It would create all sorts of chaos.

So, I get that. But I definitely wouldn’t say that, in my experience, that nothing has happened since Heaven’s Cross. For me, it’s the bleed-through of other dimensions multiple times a day. And then the challenge is patience, right? Often the challenge is patience.

The challenge is wanting to do something, wanting to fiddle with something. Give me another technique, give me whatever. I’m still a little bit like that.

Yeah, so that’s what came up immediately for me when I read that question. But yeah, it is happening, but you really just have to surrender to the bigger parts of you and understand the role of the human, you know. And then I think what’s happening behind the scenes, you get more glimpses of that when you are really willing to surrender.

Yeah, that’s my take on that so far.

Master Anna: Mmm…

Do you have anything you’d like to add, Lisa?

Go ahead.

Lisa: I just have to say, that was brilliant, Chris! I’m so glad that was recorded, because that just captures everything that we’re at right now. I mean, that metaphor that you use was just so amazing, the dam of Divinity behind you. And it’s like it’s just chomping at the bit to come through, but it has no avenue yet.

It doesn’t… There’s no place for it to go and we’re still showing up in the old patterns, which has us kind of like WTF? Like who are we, what are we supposed to be doing? And it’s the perfect way to explain exactly where we…

I mean, I work in New York City. I work down at the World Trade Center where 9/11 happened, so I’m surrounded in concrete density and I don’t even know how I made it this far, still functioning as a lawyer in a 3D life.

Chris: It’s impressive!

Lisa: You don’t know!

I mean, I can do it better now, because I think I’m in a place now where I accept where I’m at and my human role. Whereas before, I just didn’t want any part of it. I was pissed. I was resentful. Why am I still here? Why hasn’t my soul saved me yet from this, you know?

And now I realize that I’m not supposed to be saved, and I’m there for a reason. I still don’t have clarity on the reason yet, but I accept that that’s where I’m supposed to be right now. And as you say, I just know something is waiting and percolating in the background that I don’t have full clarity on yet.

So I’m accepting where I’m at, I’m playing the role I’m at, and I’m actually even able to do it easier, because I’ve settled into accepting this now. I’ve moved out of resentment and anger and that whole phase of the human pissed-offness. But anyway, I just had to comment that that was just perfectly said.

Master Anna: Good.

Monica. How is your experience?

You’ll need to unmute. 

Monica: My experience is like…

Oh, hello together, first.

My experience is like that, that I’m speechless at the moment!

Yeah, I see that the since Heaven’s Cross I changed a lot, and my perception changed a lot towards other people. It was a lot of relationships, or far relationships, don’t mean anything to me anymore. I’m not interested. I just let it go. I’m less and less that into, um, relation to them. But it’s not that I have a reason, it’s just happening.

And, yeah, I have my business. I have two businesses. In one business, I have a practice where I treat people, and there I have less and less clients. The days are empty, but still I can pay all bills. Sometimes I don’t know how this is happening, because years ago I was full, fully booked, and now suddenly the days are empty and I still exist as a human in this world with everything.

And my second business I started yesterday. Not yesterday, last year. I’m sorry. There is a lot of turmoil from the outside. These companies, they deliver me products. They are shortly before bankruptcy and such stuff, and this came out in the last two or three weeks.

So also for me, it’s open how this is going on, if this will develop more or if I will step out of this in the near future. This is changing, but this takes also a lot of my attention every day, this business. This is what I don’t like so much, because it is a lot of mind work also, and my mind is just tired to deal with this.

I have also problems to sit in front of a computer a long time. My throat is becoming hot and itchy, I just feel not well, I don’t know how to do this work in the future.

So yeah, it’s a huge change, and the workshop we are doing with you, John, I would like it going on forever! I like to be in this workshop, I’m looking forward all the time. “Oh, it’s session again!”

And yeah, it is a joy. I just feel joy to be with all of you and to develop and experience our divinity. Yeah, I feel also, like you guys, that something is coming and I’m ready.

Thank you.

Master Anna: Thank you!

And thank you, each of you, for sharing.

Chris, let’s go with that next question.

Chris:Okay.

Hello Master Anna,

In the last channel you spoke about letting go of human patterns, body, etc…

And that this would be the only thing that would keep us from going into full realization.

As for me, in the course of the process I have let go of a lot and of course also thought about what else there is to let go of!

Because we are human beings, of course, we also have patterns that we follow daily from things like brushing our teeth or the morning coffee with a cigarette or whatever….please go into more detail on the topic of ‘human patterns’.

Thank you!

Master Anna: Ahh…

Well, you could say that patterns are the essence of mass-consciousness. You could say they are belief systems, which are simply, well, they are patterns. They are the things you keep thinking, and you keep… No, it’s deeper than that.

They are the structure that forms your reality.

Hmm…

A few days ago, John was reading one of his books. He likes novels that have something to do with fantasy and magic. He was reading this book, and in the book one of the characters had to go into the world of the dead. Which, in this particular story, you could do that through certain portals. And she got there, and she looked around and there were all these people there who had died, and she could talk with them. They were walking around, but none of them could remember who they were or anything about their life, and they were just empty. Blank. They could carry on a conversation, but they didn’t know… They had forgotten everything about themselves in their previous lifetime.

And something about that triggered something in John, and he just stopped, put the book down, and felt the tears coming for a little bit as he realized how, when you die you don’t actually forget everything, but when you come back in you do. And there is a really good reason for that, because somehow you have to break the pattern.

The near-earth realms are full of people who have died, but who are still living out essentially the same reality that they lived out in their lifetime on Earth. They are still recreating it. It’s what they are used to, and in the near-earth realms you create whatever it is that you are used to.

And so they are just continuing, in a sense, their human lifetime, until at some point they either wake up and move on, or they get sucked back into another lifetime where they forget and start a new pattern. A pattern based on the patterns of the people around them, and on what they feel from before.

So, the question that came up for John, because, oh, he feels this incredible transition that we are going through right now. And the question that arose is, “How do you change your pattern, or let go of a pattern, when you are still living it?” because that’s what we are doing. And it’s never been done before.

You are letting go of these patterns while you are still in the middle of them.

There are all these patterns that you live out, and none of them come from your soul. They are human. They are part of mass-consciousness.

And that doesn’t mean they are bad. They are just part of the human construct, the human imagination. And because it’s there, it takes form in your life. It feels solid and real. It isn’t, actually, but it feels like it.

Mmm…

There was a time, oh, many years ago, 2004 or 2005, somewhere around there, John went to the summer conference of the Crimson Circle, and one of the guest presenters was an online radio personality, a “new age” person. And as part of her presentation, she brought in a bunch of spoons and did a spoon bending demonstration.

She handed these metal spoons out to everybody and talked about it a little bit, took them through a little meditation, and took them to the point of, “Now, see your spoon get soft so that you can just bend it without forcing it.”

Well, John was curious, and he came to that point. And when it was time he could feel the spoon, and for a split second he felt that spoon go as soft as butter. And he knew that whatever he did with it at that point—he could reshape it, he could do anything with it—for a split second. And then he pushed it away.

Because he also knew that if he could do that with that spoon, he could do that with anything else in life.

He could do that with a giant piece of steel, it wouldn’t matter, or anything else. He could turn it into butter and turn it into whatever he wanted it to be. And that was scary, so he closed it off right then.

But that is the kind of transition that you are going through right now. And that is why it’s a little challenging.

Hmm…

The human gets impatient, but then the human sees what’s actually happening and freaks out a little bit and goes, “Oh, I’m not sure I’m ready for that!”

And you’ve all been there before, to a certain extent, in certain ways. You have learned how to manipulate reality in other lifetimes, and you have used it in ways that you are not too happy about. Many of them that you feel guilty about. You used them for power over people.

But, you are not there anymore. You are not in a place where you are going to misuse this new reality, because now you understand that it’s yours. It’s just you. But there is still that human fear of, what if I misuse this?

And there is also the fear of, what if it doesn’t work?

In that instant John knew that spoon was as soft as butter. But there was a part of him that couldn’t quite do anything with that, because, well, what if it doesn’t work? Then I’m going to feel like an idiot, or I’m going to feel disappointed yet again.

That’s a big thing for the human!

Hmm…

John is looking at his life right now and going, “Oh, there are so many things that it’s time for them to change.” And he knows that it is so simple! He can feel it. It is so simple!

It’s just a little step across that threshold, into an entirely different reality.

He is so used to the patterns in the reality he’s been in, that it’s not an easy thing to actually take that step.

It’s like back when he first felt himself channeling, many years ago. He was leading this group in Santa Fe, New Mexico, a spiritual discussion group. He felt drawn to create this group and he was leading it every week, and one evening… Oh, he was starting to wonder, “What am I doing with this?”

One evening the group got together and they were talking, and he felt Mother Mary coming in really close and saying to him, “I want to talk.” And he could feel the first couple of words she wanted to say.

But suddenly he was terrified. His mind was going, “Well, okay, but if I say those words, what comes after them? What if there’s nothing there and I just lose all my words, like I’ve done so many times?” And so he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t bring himself to open his mouth and say those words, which would have started a whole conversation with Mother Mary right then.

This was back in 2003. He could have started channeling right then, but that pattern was so strong that it felt like such a big step. It was such a little step that he needed to take, but it felt so big that he couldn’t do it. And so he finally turned to somebody else in the group that was used to channeling and said, “I feel Mother Mary, and she wants to talk. Can you let her in?”

And shortly after that he couldn’t figure out where he was going with the group, so he ended the group. And it was another ten years before he finally began to let himself step over that edge.

And now here we are, and he’s channeling his own soul.

But that is exactly the kind of transition you are going through right now. It takes time! Not because it needs to, but because the human is having a really challenging time letting go of the patterns, of the familiar. And at some point, you will.

Ahh…

It’s really important here, not to go into shame about that!

John felt his fear in that moment, and he accepted it. And that’s important! And, he wasn’t really ready to go into channeling as a regular thing. But it was an experience that opened an awareness in him, and when the time came he was ready.

And the same is true for you, and for every pattern that you are coming up against. Don’t shame yourself about not being able to step over yet. This is where you are at. You are feeling it. You are becoming aware of it. And like anything in life, the solution is always in simply becoming aware of it.

Hmm…

Another story from John’s life, a few years before that happened. Oh, he was living in Alabama. He was reading all these new age books and going through his awakening, opening up and discovering himself, and he started noticing all these issues in his life. Patterns, habits, that he didn’t like. Ways of being that he didn’t like.

And some of them were so big that he said, “I don’t know what to do with those, so I’m going to focus on these over here that I feel like I can manage, and try to get over them or overcome them, or fix them, or whatever.” And so he spent the next couple of years working really hard to change some of those patterns in himself.

Then, a few years later, he was thinking about that one day and he asked himself, “Whatever happened?” He remembered that time when he was looking at all of those issues and he thought back, “Whatever happened to those?”

And he realized (it was a profound realization!) that of the patterns he had tried to fix, he was still working on them. Some of them felt a little better at this point, but he was still working on a lot of them and still feeling ashamed of a lot of them.

Then he asked himself, “What about the ones that seemed so big that I couldn’t even imagine how to address them, so I just let them go for then?” And he looked at his life, and he realized that for the most part, they were gone. They had transformed. They had resolved themselves! And it was this huge, profound, shocking awareness for John.

And he realized, It’s better if I don’t work on these things. It’s better if I just notice them, and accept them, and let them be part of me, and trust that that simple awareness is going to bring whatever is needed. And that is so important for right now!

As you are going through this transition, oh, John still gets caught up in it all the time! It’s like, how do I transform my body? How do I transform my finances? How do I—all these things that he feels like need to be different in his life!

And then he remembers: Okay, I need to go sit down with my silly book for a little while and let it all go, and turn it over to my soul. I am aware of the issues, and I need to just let them be there. I need to let that part of me be how it is. I need to let myself be stuck in some of these patterns, because that is about loving self. That is about accepting self just the way I am, and that is the solution to everything.

In that place of… Oh, this new word for it is receiving. In that place of receiving, everything can begin to change.

If it changes gradually or if it changes faster, either way it tends to make the human a little crazy. When things change too fast the human freaks out, and when things don’t change fast enough the human freaks out. And that’s just how it is.

So here you are, in this incredible transformation!

You ARE stepping out of mass-consciousness. It is happening! And the only thing you can really do with it right now is, just be with it.

And trust your feelings. When you need air, go out and get some air. When you need sleep, get some sleep. When you need to work, work. Whatever it is you feel inspired to do right now, just do that. Because your soul has everything, everything… Oh, John wanted to say, “Under control,” but that’s not how it is. It’s not controlled.

A better word might be, it’s all handled. It’s all handled by your soul.

It’s taken care of. Maybe not the way the human thinks it should be, and that’s why it is so important to let go of those human agendas, those ideas of how things should be.

It’s probably not going to be that way. But it is going to be how it needs to be, for the smoothest and best possible transformation. If you trust yourself in the moment. If you trust your feelings in the moment of, “What inspires me in this moment?”

Mmm…

Some things are going to fall apart. Other things are going to come in.

If you can let that happen, you will be amazed. A couple of years from now you’ll look back and go, “Wow, look at where I’m at now!”

Oh, it will probably still be uncomfortable at times, because that is the nature of human life. But you will know what to do with it at that point. You just let it be, and then it passes. You let the change happen, and then the new comes in.

Mmm…

So, any questions or thoughts at this point?

Silvia.

Silvia: I do have a question: All of this transformation of mass-consciousness is changing, and the news is coming in. But what is the difference between the new and the old?

Master Anna: Hmm…

That is for you to discover.

Oh, we can’t answer that question. We don’t know. You are going into a place that nobody has ever really been to before. Some of the ascended masters came close to it, but nobody has ever been through this kind of transformation before.

We can tell you a little bit of what it’s about. It is about becoming free. It is about releasing yourself from those patterns.

Oh, you’ll still play with patterns, for that’s what it takes to be in human form. Even if you let go of the pattern you have right now, you have to create a new pattern in order to have a body. And that is part of the challenge that your body is going through right now: its pattern is changing.

How it changes, how far it goes, oh, we imagine it changing to the point where you can just let your body disappear, and you can be off in any other part of reality or any other realm that you want to be. And then it can reappear again here on Earth and you can live just like a human, except you are not really a human anymore.

That’s just one potential, a big potential. We don’t yet know everything about it. But the transition you are going through is the transition from being limited by the patterns of mass-consciousness, to being completely free to live within whatever pattern you choose, or not.

Silvia: As a human, what Sylvia is experiencing is that every desire that she has, it manifests. Right away. And she is surprised by the change, because it’s happening so fast. Everything, synchronicity, is there. It all shows up. The things show up. It was her desire to transform, and it is there.

Master Anna: Indeed. And that is where you are going, where you already are.

SIlvia: Sometimes the human part forgets about it and gets hurt. The body gets hurt.

Master Anna: Yes, exactly.

Those patterns, what they really are, are habits. They are just habits.

A habit isn’t always easy to change, but it can be changed. And that is all a pattern really is.

That is all your body really is. It’s a habit! And if you change that habit, it will change your body. Your body will change to match.

Hmm…

Lisa.

Lisa: So, I admire Sylvia where she’s at. I’m envious. I’m still not quite… While I’m growing more patient, I recognize I’m still in a bit of a wait mode.

Where is the line between the human just taking a leap of faith into freedom, and waiting for a right prompt to be useful in the next step? Because I could quit my job tomorrow and go live off savings, but that doesn’t really feel right to me. That doesn’t feel like…

I could declare myself free tomorrow, but it doesn’t feel like the right thing to do. I’m not being prompted to do that. It would just be running away from something that I don’t like.

So I struggle with, where is the line, the proper line or right line, if there is such a thing, between the human accepting what is, and moving in the right direction as laid out by the soul?

Master Anna: Where do you want it to be?

Lisa: I’d like to have clarity. I don’t have clarity. I just don’t have clarity. I want to know, like, I have made some major leaps of faith in my life already. I have already done the unthinkable and bounced back from it, where everyone in my life looked at me and said, “What, are you crazy?” you know.

And both of those examples included quitting jobs that were fantastic jobs, that I just was so unhappy at. So I just quit! And with no plan, and people thought I was nuts. And I thought I was nuts too, frankly!

Master Anna: We know the feeling!

Lisa: But it always put me back into a place of yet another job. These jobs came at me and I was like, okay. I didn’t go looking for it, technically, but I did go through the fear of no income, you know, and all of the issues that one goes through when you don’t have a pattern in your life as a human.

But now I’m back in a job. I don’t really feel any connection to it, but it’s sustaining me. It enabled me to pay for this class, you know, I accept the abundance that comes from these jobs that I have, but it doesn’t feel like it’s truly me.

Master Anna: So what would be you? What would be truly you?

Lisa: Teaching.

Teaching. I have felt myself as a teacher my whole life, and when I was going through the ugliest part of this transition I knew it wasn’t time yet. And I’m so glad, you know, my friend was trying to get me to start a website and do all the stuff, and I was like, “I don’t feel fully baked yet. I know I’m still in the oven.”

And I’m so glad, because I knew that it hadn’t landed, and it still hasn’t landed yet.

Master Anna: Can you trust that?

Lisa: Do I trust that?

Master Anna: Can you trust that?

Lisa: Oh, yeah! Yeah, now I do. But it doesn’t remove the frustration at the lack of clarity.

You know, I feel by this time in my process I should have more clarity about where I’m going, what I’m doing, you know, but I can also accept on the other hand that it’s not ready yet. You know, it’s just not ready yet, and I’m being taken care of in the interim.

Master Anna: Yeah.

See, the mind is really good at taking a word like “clarity” and conflating it with human agendas. So, what if you can just be where you are? And if there’s…

You see, one of the things about a human in mass-consciousness is that the human always wants to know what’s going to happen next.

And as you step into your mastery, you don’t really get to know what’s going to happen next anymore. You can feel direction some of the time, and some of the time not.

A few years ago, John went to the Simple Master class in Colorado, and on the other side of that he knew it was time to… He went back to Oregon where he was living in his van at the time and he felt, “I need to sell this van.” And that’s all he knew. He didn’t know what he was going to do after.

But he could feel that something had shifted, and he tried to look into his future. What am I doing? Where am I going? What’s my direction? And it was just blank. Gray blank.

And he went, “Wow! Okay.” And at that point he knew to trust that.

So, he sold the van and lived with a friend for a couple of months. And then other things came up, and he ended up back in Colorado remodeling his sister’s, Jean Tinder’s, kitchen. And the whole time, for like six months, every time he looked at, What am I doing? Where am I going? What should I be doing? It was just a blank grey wall.

And the feeling was real clear: Just be here. Do what you are doing. Don’t worry about the future, because you can’t imagine it yet.

Well, then one day he got an email from a friend saying, “I’m having a retreat in Greece and I just saw you in that Simple Master video, and I thought oh, you should come to Greece and get some sun and some hugs!”

And John went, “Wow, that would sure feel good! But oh, I don’t have much money and I don’t know how I could do that.”

And all of a sudden I came in, his soul, and I said, “John, shut the fuck up! Just say yes, and see what happens!”

Well, John’s life changed. A few months later he was on an airplane with a one-way ticket to Greece and just enough money to pay the hotel bill at the retreat, and no idea what was happening next.

Well, ha! Two months later he was married and living in Slovenia, and he’s still so happy about that.

Mmm…

So, Adamus said one time, it’s in one of the recordings from Egypt that he made an exception to his rule about never saying I don’t know. He said, “There is one time where a master says, ‘I don’t know.’ And that is, if you ask a master what they are going to be doing tomorrow they’ll usually say, ‘I don’t know.’ Because they don’t. It hasn’t been written yet. They don’t know what energies are going to come into play. They don’t know what is coming, because it’s not written yet. There are lots and lots of potentials!”

So, what John learned in that was to just be open.

As a master you are not going to know what’s going to happen next. You’ll have ideas, you’ll have feelings, usually.

John can usually feel a direction. He doesn’t know how it’s going to play out or what exactly is going to happen, because a master lives now. And there is so much happening now that you don’t know how that is going to lead into the next moment.

So, it is so much, right now, about letting go of the human agendas, the human ideas about what the future should be, and just being with what is right now.

And if an opportunity comes to teach, or whatever else, you feel it. You dance with it and see how it feels. And if it inspires you, then trust that.

And if you start feeling frustrated because you know you need to do something and you are afraid to do it, well, then that’s the time to make a choice.

But if you are just frustrated because you don’t know what that is yet, then be patient. Trust what is right now. Be in the moment right now. Receive. Receive what it is right now.

Be in the experience, and it will all get clear in the right time.

Ever since his awakening, John spent so many years trying to figure out, “I know I need to be a teacher, but I don’t know how to start doing it!”

Well, sometimes you have to realize that you are being a teacher even if you are just working your job, being a lawyer, being whatever. Sometimes by just being alive on the planet.

Your Light is so bright! And you ARE a teacher, even if you are not sitting in front of a group sharing your wisdom.

Sometimes, that is the most profound kind of teaching!

So, just trust that.

Lisa: Thank you. That was very helpful.

I got a very clear distinction in my head about being frustrated because of nothing happening yet, but where I need to be patient because it’s not ready, and holding back on what I know I have to do because of fear. Because that’s when your soul will kick you right out of the comfort zone.

And if you are holding back on something out of fear, that you really should be doing already, that’s when it starts to feel overwhelming. But if it’s just frustration because it’s not happening yet, you know, you feel the difference. You feel that nuance. I mean, I used to be the assistant chief counsel at ESPN in New York, and it was the most coveted job in New York. And it was my dream job, and it turned into a nightmare! And it started my awakening.

I couldn’t believe God gave me my dream job to be this miserable, so it set me off on my awakening path. And I don’t know how many years later, 11 years later, I quit. And it came to me as I was sitting in a big meeting, like all I kept hearing was, “It’s time to go now! You know it’s time to go. You have to leave!”

And I had no plan. I had no job. Anyway, bottom line, I just quit. I took that leap of faith and I ended up bottoming out and, you know, that’s went off on a whole other track.

But I know the difference when you are holding back out of fear and you are getting kicked off the plank, versus you are just frustrated because it’s not there yet, because you might have a human desire or agenda.

But then, I’m learning how to just be where I am. And I could see even my daily interactions, even with my colleagues, how I touch them. How my energy is touching them in ways that I’m seeing. It’s subtle, but I’m sensing and seeing it. And so there’s always a reason, and maybe, again, my energy has to be in that 9/11 area, you know, literally where the Twin Towers came down.

I can rationalize how I’m being used, in a sense, right now, and I am where I am. I’m not thrilled. It’s not bringing me joy. I don’t get out of bed clicking my heels every morning. And that kind of feels like I’m entitled to that. That would be my teaching, or some other path would be my soul fulfillment. But my soul will bring that when it’s ready, and I just trust that now. So thank you.

Master Anna: Yes, it will.

A song has been going through John’s mind the last few days, for some reason: “I never promised you a rose garden!”

Lisa: Yeah, who knew? If we knew what we were signing up for, really, would we have done this?

[laughter]

Master Anna: And human life is messy, and it’s supposed to be messy. And confusing at times. And you are moving beyond that, slowly. But even when you have the choice to move completely beyond it, you are still probably going to play in it some.

And that is such a beautiful thing! Especially when it is totally by choice. Then there is joy even when it’s yucky and messy and you are going, arrrg! There is still joy in it.

Mmm…

That’s something John has learned in the last few years. So often life is so confusing and painful and messy and yet, underneath it, there is this joy. This knowing.

It’s not all happy and like everything is peaches and cream. But underneath, there is this ground of knowing. And you can call it joy.

So, who else? Does anybody else have questions or comments at this point?

Silvia.

Silvia: I just have a comment for Lisa. As you said, it’s just live in the now, what will bring in the moment, every moment as a moment. It changes everything. Just realizing that you are living, you are having an experience, and everything will come to your place. Synchronizing.

Of course, you decide to do it or not to do it. You have a choice. You decide if you want to be overwhelmed or not. Last past week, Silvia had body problems, body ache, mosquito bite, and that’s what she needed. Just to let it go. Let all the control, let all the programs, let everything go.

And then suddenly her birthday arrived, and she was so excited because it was her birthday! And happy! And she realized, oh, nobody’s going to organize the birthday, so she’s going to do it. She did it, and she had a wonderful day! She created what she wanted, and even more. Everything was synchronized. Everything, everything. But the joy of living, the joy of experiencing, the joy of enjoying family, family that you haven’t seen in a while.

But everything is changing in my life. But it has to happen. You have to just lay down for a week in a bed and let everything change.

Master Anna: Yes.

And sometimes that’s all there is to do. Just be here with what is. Let it hurt. Let it be whatever it is. And receive. You are not receiving anything specific. You are just receiving.

Mmm…

Silvia: And about clarity. We want to have a video in our head of what we’re going to do for the future, but it doesn’t work like that. It’s the moment [garbled].

Master Anna: Clarity, real clarity, is about being clear in yourself right now. This is what I’m choosing in this moment, whatever it is, and I know that future moments are going to take care of themselves.

Silvia: Yes, you have the right to choose or cancel the experience we are having in front.

Master Anna: Yes. Mmm…

Chris or Monica?

Okay. Chris, let’s go with that final question that was sent in.

Chris: Okay.

When feeling into this group, the space we’re creating together, for our meetings, it appeared quite somber to me, and rather serious. Of course there are all the challenges we’re going through, each of us in their own way.

But humour makes everything easier. It lightens up, whatever is happening. And Divinity in Experience should be light, airy, joyful.

So: If this isn’t just my own imagination (smile):

Could we insert some humour, more lightness, and cheerfulness into our space? Especially since it IS challenging, and the world IS in chaos.

What say you,

Master John & Anna

Chris: I say Lisa has her rosé today, so we’re doing pretty good!

Master Anna: Ahh…

We would say, dear one who sent in this question, if you have some humor you would like to send in, please feel free! And we know you are very good at that.

But the one thing we would disagree so strongly with, is that divinity in experience should be always light and airy.

No. That’s a lot of what we’ve been talking about here. That’s a human agenda, and it’s not going to happen. Sometimes it will be. And sometimes it will be deep and dense and dark and yucky feeling, because that is who you are.

Your darkness is your divinity.

You are bringing all of that together, and receiving all of that. And that is where we find the freedom and the joy and the realization and, oh, everything that the human really wants.

So, we are not really interested in everything being all light and airy here. Not at all! There will be plenty of that, and we think this session demonstrates that.

But there will also be the somber, and the dark, and the dreary feeling at times. The frustration at times.

That’s just part of being human, and what you are doing is bringing your divinity into human, in a sense. Or you are bringing them together, so it’s going to be part of it.

So, by all means, send in some humor!

And, receive. Receive the somber as well as the humor.

Mmm…

Oh, receiving. Our new word. Thank you to Adamus for pointing it out, but we were already coming to it.

It’s what allowing was all about. It’s about receiving. Receiving me.

Ha! That is, me receiving me. You receiving you.

Hmm…

In fact, we’re going to do a class called Receiving Me, an in-person class in October, here in Slovenia. At least that’s the plan right now, we will see how it works out.

But, receiving me.

Ah, receiving all that I am!

Including the darkness.

Including the humor.

Including the light.

Including the airy. But also the somber, the darkness, the dreary, the depression, the pain.

Receive it all!

Mmm…

In fact, don’t put an agenda on your receiving. Just open up!

Open your hands.

Take a deep breath.

Receive.

That’s what the feminine does.

And the heart of your soul, you could say, is feminine, no matter what kind of body you are in.

Receive.

The masculine has been out here experiencing, so that the feminine could receive and distill.

All of that is changing now.

You are reuniting with yourself.

In order for that to happen, you have to receive yourself.

You can’t be pushing away those parts of you that you don’t like, or that hurt, or that feel depressed, because to do so is going to make you feel really depressed right now. It’ll make you sick. It’ll make you miserable.

Because everything happening right now is about you, receiving you.

Mmm…

John is remembering more and more, and still forgets most of the time. But more and more he’s remembering.

When he starts worrying about things I’ll remind him, John, just receive. Just stop. Stop, take a deep breath. Let it all in. Everything. No definitions. Just open up. Let it all in.

Mmm…

That is the way forward.

That is where you will get your humor back.

That is where you will get your lightness back, or your perception of your own lightness.

But only when you receive all of you, including your darkness. Including your fears. Including where you feel like you failed. You haven’t, but you have to let that part of you in. You have to let it come home.

Receive it.

Receive every part of you.

Mmm…

Receive everything that you feel.

So often the human goes, “Oh, okay. I can receive all these things that feel good, but I don’t want any more of that! That pain, that frustration, things falling apart in my life.” And then you’re miserable again.

Receive it!

There are things going to be falling apart in your life. Can you let that happen, so that they can be replaced by something new?

You are not going to know what that new is, until it shows up. But it will be there, and you will be very happy about it!

But you have to receive all of it, including the parts that are frustrating and that hurt.

Mmm…

That is your challenge for the coming three weeks, until our next session.

If everything is going according to plan, we will be coming to you then from Central Italy. John and Romana are going to go visit a friend for a few days, and we’ll be doing this class from there.

Mmm…

Receive.

Receive!

Oh, we’re going to be talking a lot about this.

We will be releasing a channel in a day or two, that we just did about it.

And there will be more about receiving, about this deep, deep reunion of you, with you.

You ask, what is this transformation?

That’s what it is, at core. It is the reunion of all of you.

Oh, you’ve heard of the wall of fire. Tobias talked about it, where you were fragmented into so many parts and pieces.

This transition is the reunion of all of you.

Of all of those experiences.

Of all of those patterns.

Mmm…

As you allow those patterns, as you receive them—don’t fight them, receive them—as you do, as they come home, ah! They change from patterns and habits into wisdom.

So receive them.

They will change, when the time is right, when you are ready.

And there is nothing you need to do to get ready!

Mmm…

Just receive.

Receive you, just the way you are.

Receive all of you.

Receive those habits.

Ahh….

And so it is!

.

[goodbyes are said and music plays]

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