The Roots of the Pain

Why do our bodies hurt so much, especially now that we are integrating our light-bodies? Why is there so much suffering and violence in the world? My soul’s answer is that we are still falling for a very old misunderstanding.

This is the first of a two-part set. The second part, entitled The Tree of Life: An Experience, is a beautiful and multi-dimensional experience of integration and healing.


Click the triangle to play the recording.

The Roots of the Pain – by John McCurdy
Channeled on September 1, 2022

I am that I am!

I am Master John of Magical Service, here to do some magic with you today. And also, with my human called John.

I am Master John. That means that I am all that John is. I include the human that you know as John, and I include John’s soul. I am everything that this being that you call John is or has ever been, or ever will be.


John has been eagerly anticipating this message. Ha! And also desperately avoiding it. He has felt it swirling around inside him for a week or two now, at least. But what we are going to talk about is profound, and also controversial. But here we are, finally.

Oh, John has been trying to figure out, “How are we going to say this? Is it going to be part of a class? Is it going to be just a regular channel on the website? How are we going to say it? Because it’s something that needs so much to be said.”


So many of you, including John, are struggling with body issues. Many of you are wondering if you can even survive until your light-body gets here.

Well, your light-body is already here. It always has been. It just—well, in the focus and chaos of human existence, you forgot about it.


So, what’s happening in your bodies is an incredible clearing. And yes, there are times when it hurts. Times when it hurts a lot. Because, you see, there is so much shame locked away in your body.

Ha! Some of you are going, “Oh, I don’t have any shame left! I dealt with all that already.”

Well, if you have pain in your body, then you have shame left over inside of you. And it has to be cleared out, because you cannot move forward with it. It simply won’t work. You’re pushing right up against that wall, right now.

It’s the shame that causes your body to hurt. It’s the disconnect. It’s the tension between who you are and that shame that makes your body hurt.


Oh, the masters, the ascended masters, they did it the easy way. They realized who they were. They came into their enlightenment. And they said, “Great, I’m out of here!” and they left their bodies. The shame stored in those bodies was too much, so they left them.

Sometimes they burned them up. Sometimes they just left them for other people to bury or deal with, or whatever. They walked away. And that was great, for they were complete. But here you are, part of this whole group who has chosen to stay here—to come into their enlightenment and to become the masters, and to stay on Earth a little longer.


Well, so here you are. You’re up against—oh, you could call it a rock and a hard place. You’ve come to your realization. You’ve come to your enlightenment. You can’t go backwards. But now you have to deal with all of that shame that’s in your body, that’s stored in your body and in your mind. Because, well, the shame is a lie. It’s not who you are, and you can’t go forward with lies anymore. It won’t work!

So let’s take a look at where that shame came from, and continues to come from.

You see, there’s a brilliant metaphor. If you’re a Christian or a Jew, you have what you call the Holy Scriptures, or The Bible, and in the book of Genesis you have this creation story. Oh, it’s a metaphor. It was never intended to be taken literally, but it’s a brilliant metaphor.

In that metaphor God, or what the writer of the book of Genesis understood as God, created the earth and everything on it. And he created the humans, Adam and Eve.

Well, you are God, also. And you, so many of you, were involved in creating Earth, but that’s a story for another time.

In this metaphor, God created Earth, and he created a special garden on this planet. You call it the Garden of Eden. And he created Adam and Eve there, and lots and lots of trees and flowers and everything else in nature. And he created two very special trees.

Remember, this is a metaphor, and it’s telling us something very, very important.

These two special trees—one of them was called The Tree of Life, and Adam and Eve were told that as long as they ate from that tree they would never die. They would be healthy.

The other special tree was called The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. And in this metaphor God said to Adam and Eve, “Don’t ever, ever eat from that tree, because when you do, you will die.”

Well, humans, they took that metaphor and they turned it into something quite different from what was intended. They understood it as a test. This god that they imagined was a very jealous god, and humans took this as a test where God said, “Don’t eat from that tree, because if you disobey me I’ll have to kill you.” But that wasn’t the point at all.

You see, that tree had to be there. Many have wondered, why would a loving God plant a tree like that in this beautiful garden? Well, it had to be there because Earth was created for you to discover yourself.

This whole adventure started off with the question, “Who am I?”

Well, you can’t answer that question without going through the experience. It simply isn’t possible. So this tree, this metaphorical tree, was there. The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. And Adam and Eve ate from that tree, and they began to die.

It was not a punishment from God. The divine doesn’t punish. The divine doesn’t care what tree you eat from. It was not a punishment!

But you see, when you start deciding what is good and what is evil, it rips you apart inside. It destroys your body. It creates so much shame inside of you, and that is what kills your body.

Over the eons of time, you found a bit of a balance. You found enough joy in your life, and you managed to find enough of what you call “good” to balance out some of the shame, so that you could make this body last seventy or eighty years, a little bit more or a little bit less.


But if you look at your diseases, oh, at your wars and the violence, at everything in your life that destroys bodies, you will see that every bit of it is rooted in shame.

The other day John was talking with someone. This person was talking about some of the issues they were trying to get past and about how hard it is, and John heard me say, “It is because you still believe in right and wrong.”

It is because you still believe in right and wrong.

Ah, profound understanding. Oh, John has known that for some time, years in fact, and he could see in this person how true it was. It wasn’t time to say the words in that moment, but he could see how true it was.

Ha! And then I reminded him, It’s true for you too, John. Your body hurts because of the shame that’s locked away inside of it. And yes, we’ve come a long way in clearing out that shame, but it’s time for the next level.


You see, oh, the mind jumps up and says, “Wait a minute. You’re telling me that there is no wrong. You’re telling me that the people who hurt other people, who oppress them, who rape them, who enslave them, you’re telling me that isn’t wrong?”

Well, no, that is not what we are telling you. It is what it is. What we are telling you is that, as you hold on to its wrongness, you are destroying your own body.

You see, as long as you believe that there is such a thing as “wrong,” well, that means that you might be wrong. And no matter how hard you try to be right you are still going to find yourself being wrong a lot of the time, because that is the nature of life on Earth. You can never, ever, be right all the time on Earth.

And what is right or wrong?

It’s just a perspective. What you think is right is somebody else’s wrong, and what they think is right is your wrong. It’s all perspective. All of it!

You believe that there are bad people in the world. There are not! There are simply people who are doing the best that they know how to make the world a better place for themselves and for those they love. Oh, in their understanding of things, that means that they have to take power over everyone else, that they have to control and manipulate everyone else, because they think that their wellbeing comes from outside of them.

They think that freedom is evil. They think that they have the truth, and that the world can’t change or get better until everybody else believes their truth.

The man who rapes a woman, he doesn’t do it to be evil. He does it to fill a hole inside himself that he doesn’t know how to fill. It doesn’t work, and it only makes that hole deeper and bigger.

But you see, you have come to the point where you understand that everything you perceive in life is you. Even the other people. Oh, you still struggle with this one, but you know. You know in your heart, in the depths of your being, that even the other people in your life are reflections of you. They are you. They are avatars created by you, in your energies, to reflect something back to you.

Oh, they look like these other beings, because that’s how you created them. You wanted to interact with these other beings. And you see, you actually have no access to another being. Each one of you is sovereign. Each one of you is inside your own creation. You have no access to them, and they have no access to you.

We’ve talked about this in other places, how you created avatars to represent the others in your life, so that you could bounce off of them and know yourself better. So, when you call one of them evil, you are calling yourself evil.

Oh, at the level of the logical human mind, that doesn’t make sense. But it’s the truth.

There is a very true parable—or aphorism, John can’t think quite the right word—a saying, that when you point your finger at someone in accusation, there are four other fingers pointing back at you. And nothing could be more true.

When you criticize someone, when you call someone evil, when you shame them and blame them, you are criticizing yourself. You are battling with yourself.

So, we can argue forever about the philosophical implications of what we’ve just said, about whether there is good and evil or not, and it does not matter. It truly does not matter.

What matters is that, as long as you believe in good and evil, you are destroying your body.

And yes, believing in good is the same as believing in evil, because if you believe in good, well, then there has to be the opposite, because that’s how it works here on Earth. And the tension between them destroys your body. It is the source of all disease.


The knowledge of good and evil is the root cause have every disease that has ever been. It is the root cause of every act of violence that has ever happened. It is the root cause of all the suffering on your planet. It is the source of the shame that we are gently, gradually, clearing out of you and your body.

Now, we ask you not to get too in your mind with this. This isn’t something that you can deal with at the human level. It’s simply something that you need to be aware of, that you need to allow. It is your soul’s job to deal with this, and to bring you back to your soul’s perspective.

You see, your soul knows nothing about good and evil. Nothing at all. All it knows about is this incredible experience. Oh, sometimes the experience hurts. But it hurts a lot worse when you believe in evil, or good.

Your soul doesn’t. The real you has no concept of good and evil. How could it? It’s eternal.

Your soul cannot be hurt. It cannot be destroyed. It cannot be lost. It just is. It is eternal.

So, allow your soul to show you through its eyes. Don’t think about it too much, don’t philosophize about this, for it will just confuse you. Just be aware that the knowledge of good and evil is the source of your shame, and of every ache and every pain, and of every act of violence. That is its source: the knowledge of good and evil.

Now, once you have knowledge of something, you can’t undo that knowledge. You cannot not know it. So don’t get caught up in that game, either.

But what you can do is allow your soul to show you the bigger picture.


Allow your soul to show you who you really are.

You are eternal. No matter what happens to your body, you are eternal!

You cannot die. You cannot be hurt. But you created this game called Mass Consciousness, called Earth, and you came here specifically to discover yourself. And somebody came up with this idea of good and evil. Or maybe it just happened. But nevertheless, it became an incredible tool for self-discovery.

But now you’ve been there and done that. You don’t need it anymore. What you need to understand now is that, as long as you hold on to that knowledge of good and evil, it is very difficult for your soul to take it from you. Because, well, you’re not open to a bigger perspective.

You find it hard to release these issues, and they keep coming up over and over again. Because, well, you look back on the things that happened and you still have this righteous reaction of how evil that was, how other people abused you and the people around you, how you fought to protect the things that were important to you, how you were mistreated and oppressed. And in that reaction, oh, as you just think about what you think happened, your brain floods your body with destructive chemicals. Because that’s how it works.

You get into the emotions. Emotions are nothing more than a bunch of chemicals in your body designed to—oh, the mind thinks they’ll protect you. In reality, they only attract more of the same.

More than that, your reality is made up of belief systems. That’s what mass consciousness is. We’ve called it a template, a construct. It’s a construct of belief systems, roughly organized according to this template so that each one of you, in your own creation, have a somewhat common reference point. Or a similar experience.

And so, when you believe there is such a thing as evil, well, then it comes into your life. Because it must. Whatever it is you believe in is what manifests in your life.

What is a belief? It’s really just the thoughts and the assumptions that you are not even aware that you are thinking and assuming.

If you think about your life, there are so many things that you simply take for granted. The chair you are sitting on, it holds you up. It’s solid. It connects you to the earth. It gives your body something to rest itself on. It gives you a bit of stability. It’s a belief! That’s all it is. But you assume it to be real, and so it is.

Well, you also assume that evil is real, and so it is. Because that’s the way this human experience works.

Now, your job is not to change your belief systems and your assumptions. That’s not really possible for the human to do. Oh, you’ll find teachers and classes all over the world trying to teach you how to do that, but it doesn’t work. You can shift them a little bit, rearrange them a little bit, but for the most part you really cannot change them from the human perspective.

What changes a belief system is seeing something new. Seeing from your soul’s perspective, a bigger perspective.

Ah, people used to believe that the earth is flat, and that the sun goes around the earth. And if you walk outside and look around, and look up to the sky, well, that’s what it looks like. And—ha!—people still argue about that! (For most of them though, it’s just something to argue about, something to make them feel a little different. They know better.)

But you see, at some point mankind went into space. And once you’ve been in space and looked back at the earth, and studied the nature of life and of the cosmos, there is simply no question anymore.

That belief that the earth was flat, oh, it was very real. For so many people it was absolutely flat, and that is how they experienced it. But not anymore, because now you know. You saw the bigger picture, and then you started seeing evidence for that everywhere. For this new belief.

Oh, it’s still just a belief. It’s all an illusion, conjured up in your own soul’s imagination. There is nothing real about any of it, except for the experience that you have with it.

So, you’ve got a bigger picture. Now you understand that the earth goes around the sun and that the earth is a round ball. It’s a big step forward, and it came with new perspective. It came from a new and bigger perspective.

Well, the same thing is happening to you right now. Your soul is showing you a bigger perspective. Your soul is not asking you to do anything about it, it is simply asking you to allow this new perspective into your awareness.

You see, all the philosophical details of whether there is good and evil or not are meaningless. They are like people talking about whether the earth is flat or not. What’s important, is that you have seen the bigger picture and that you allow that awareness in.

Everything else will take care of itself, because it has to. When you expand a belief system, or take a belief system completely away, your reality changes to match that. And as you allow yourself—it’s not something to do, it’s simply something to allow—as you allow yourself to come to terms with the fact that there is no evil and there is no good, there just is, there is just experience; as you allow yourself to come to terms with that, to let that in, your reality will begin to change to match that. Your body will find a new ease.


It is your soul’s job to bring all of this into balance, not the human’s job. That would just be diving into more good and evil! No, your job is to simply allow the new perspective, and then to be in the experience.

Whatever it is you are experiencing, stop judging it. Stop calling it either good or evil. Just be in it. Allow it. And watch what happens in your life and in your body.

Once again, don’t judge what is happening in your body. Don’t call it good or evil.

Oh, if you start looking at it, you are going to see how practically everything you experience in your life, you give it a label. You call it good or you call it evil, or bad, or painful, or whatever. The words are not important, it’s the feeling.

So, step back a little. Just have the experience without judgment, without labels.

Yes, sometimes it hurts. But you will find that when you are simply present with the pain—oh, breathe it in. Don’t call it bad, don’t call it good. Just breathe it in. It’s just an experience, and it’s a very, very momentary experience if you look at the eternity that you are. It’s very momentary, very temporary.

When you allow it, truly allow it, you won’t suffer so much with it.


You see, suffering isn’t the same as pain. You tend to think that it is, but it isn’t. Suffering is what you do with the pain. It’s how you judge it.

You feel the pain and you think, “Oh, something is wrong!” And then you start suffering. It turns into a spiral that goes down and down, and you hurt worse and worse.

Suffering is a choice. You don’t have to suffer, no matter how badly you hurt.

Take the judgment off. Simply breathe in the experience.

Don’t trying to change it. Don’t try to fix it.

So many people, they work real hard to breathe it in or to allow it, and then they panic because nothing changed. Or nothing that they could perceive, anyway. And that’s the key. They still believed in the evil of that pain, and so of course it couldn’t change.

You see, so much of what allowing is about is stepping beyond your belief systems, but these belief systems are so ingrained in you. You think you have to fight the evil, and so you do. And that only, ever, reinforces the evil.

When you get all righteous about the horrible things that were done to you, or that are being done to other people, it only ever reinforces those things. It reinforces the pain that you feel, and it attracts more of those things into your life.

Allowing is coming back to your soul’s perspective and remembering that your soul simply does not know good or evil. Your soul simply has the experience.

Ha! And that is why your soul is eternal. That is why you are an eternal being: because your soul does not know good or evil.


But now, because of you, your soul knows about good and evil, and what an illusion it is. It’s not real!

It is simply a belief. A belief that kills. A belief that kills you and destroys your body.

So, we are not going to argue about whether there is good or evil or not. That is irrelevant. But we ask you to hear us when we say: It is your belief in good and evil that keeps your body hurting, and that makes it hurt worse and worse the closer you come to your full enlightenment, and the closer you come to your light-body.

Because, you see, your light-body has no place for good and evil. It has no place for shame. It is simply incompatible, and as your light-body integrates more and more with you, it burns those things out. But you keep holding on to them, and so they hurt. They hurt your body.


You criticize yourself. You shame yourself. You think you did something wrong, or you simply think you could do something wrong. And your body hurts, because you are destroying it.

You criticize other people. You blame them. You think about and talk about how evil they are, or how evil they were in the past and how they hurt you, how they destroyed such beauty, how they hurt women and other people, and your body hears that.

Your body has its own intelligence, but it is not as smart as you. Or maybe it’s wiser than you!

Your mind says, “Oh, I’m not talking about my own body, so why would it react to that?” But your body knows that those other people are facets of you, and when you talk about them your body takes that in.

It remembers the times that you have done those things. And oh yes, you have! If you are here, if you are at this final stage of your journey, oh yes, you have done those things. Everything that you blame others for, you have done it!

Because that was part of your journey. It was part of coming to here. Mostly you don’t remember those things because your soul holds them away from you, for they would just be a distraction. But you have done those things, and your body knows it, so when you condemn other people for that your body takes that in and feels ashamed.

And even if you hadn’t done those things, your body knows that you could. It feels the blame and it says, “Oh, they’re blaming that other person, but what if they think that way about me too?” And your body feels ashamed.

Even your mind feels ashamed, so your brain floods your body with the chemicals of shame and you get cancer, or diabetes, or any of the other diseases.


So, the next time you find yourself talking about the evils of others, remember that. Your body is hearing that, and is taking it in as though you were talking about it.

So come back.

Come back to your soul’s perspective, where there is no good or evil. There is simply an incredible experience and a sovereign, divine being discovering more of itself.

From your soul’s perspective, it is all so beautiful! Even the painful parts.

It is so beautiful!

It has brought so many incredible colors—for lack of a better word—so many incredible colors into your energy, into your field, and into your experience.

Your soul has taken all of that and distilled the wisdom from it.

Oh, you think of wisdom like human knowledge, and it’s not that at all. There is no good or evil in wisdom.

There is something so much deeper, something that we have no words for, but you can feel it. You can feel it in your heart, so come back to that.

Come back to that and allow your soul to show you the new perspectives.

Allow your soul to show you your own assumptions about life.

You see, you wanted to break free of mass consciousness. Well, mass consciousness is nothing more than a collection of assumptions. That’s it! That’s all it is: a collection of assumptions. And those assumptions are what create your life and keep you stuck in it.

So, allow your soul to show you your assumptions, the things that you take for granted, and allow them to change.

Oh, don’t get caught up in trying to change them. That’s futile. That’s just another battle against the evil, or what you perceive as the evil of those assumptions that have created things you don’t like.

No, just allow yourself to see them. That’s all it takes!

Years and years ago, John was looking at his life and seeing all these issues. Things he couldn’t stand about himself, things he felt like he was a total failure at, and some of them he picked up and worked really hard at changing. Others were so overwhelming that he just let them go. “I’ll come back to them later,” he thought.

Well, a number of years later his life had changed dramatically, and he looked back one day and thought, “What happened to those issues that I was so concerned about a few years ago?” And he was surprised at what he discovered!

He discovered that the issues that he had taken on and worked so hard to fix were mostly still in his life, whereas the ones that had seemed so overwhelming that he had just let them go, had actually gone out of his life. They weren’t there anymore! And that was a really important lesson for John.

He realized that it isn’t about how hard you work on yourself, or how much you try to change yourself. It is about how willing you are to see the issue.

Simply see it! Allow it into your awareness, and let it go. Don’t fight it, breathe it in.

Breathe it in!

Because that is how you release something: You breathe it in. You acknowledge it. You see it. You allow yourself to see it for what it is.

Oh, so many of those assumptions, you see them as your truth. And so they are.

That’s how you create your reality, and so they are your truth. And they reinforce themselves. But they are just assumptions.

When you allow yourself to see that, then your soul can take it and dispose of it, and integrate the wisdom.


Oh, you can pick it back up and play with it anytime you want to, but that’s your choice. Don’t do that!

When you let something go, just let it go. Move on! Turn your attention to something else, and let it go.


So, here we are. A turning point in your journey, if you allow it. A big turning point!

Hm. We’ve been talking about a class we’re going to do called, How to Change Your Life. Oh, we might get to it at some point, but this is the key.

This is the key: Allow yourself to understand that there is no evil.

And there is no good, either, because they are two sides of the same thing. They are two sides of you, and that battle can never be won. But you can step back. You can breathe it in. You can go beyond it.

That’s difficult, because there is that righteous part of you that really, really needs to—well, you’re really just trying to distance yourself from that kind of behavior. You feel so much shame inside of you that you can’t stand it, and so you have to blame it on those others. But that doesn’t solve the shame.

What solves the shame is in recognizing that, for one thing, you’ve been there. You absolutely have, whether you remember it or not. You have been there. You have perpetrated the same evil on others, or what you call evil. If you hadn’t, you wouldn’t even be aware of it. You wouldn’t care about it. But you have, and oh, you feel so much shame about that.

But what you need to understand, even beyond that, is that it was just an experience. It only affected that particular human in that particular moment, that tiny moment in your eternity.

It wasn’t what you think it was. It was, simply, part of a game.

The human doesn’t like that, because the human feels ashamed. It feels like it was damaged somehow. It feels—ah, looking for the right words…

The human feels outraged at how it was treated, but that is only because the human forgot who it is. The human forgot that it was a facet of its own self that did that. It forgot that it created that experience for a reason. A reason that it is not, and probably cannot be, aware of, but your soul is.

Your soul can show you, if you let it. But you have to get beyond that outrage.

You have to let your soul show you.


We will follow up this message with a special experience. A gentle, beautiful experience to help you let this in, and to help you open more to you, to all of you.

For now, just let in the awareness that the suffering in your body, and in any other part of your life, is there because you still believe in good and evil.

We are going to move beyond that.

It is necessary, in order to go forward.

It is not about justifying anything. No, this is about coming home to you and about letting go of the pain in your body.

It is about allowing the light-body to come in, because the light-body cannot integrate into an atmosphere, or even into the knowledge, of good and evil. It simply cannot.

And, because you have chosen your light-body and you have chosen this new awareness, if you fight it, it hurts.

So, put down the sword. Let go of the righteousness and the outrage.

It’s just a game.

What happens here on Earth is no more real—ultimately, it is no more real than what happens in your computer game. Or in your child’s computer game, since many of you probably aren’t into computer games so much.

But you know what we are talking about, and you know in your heart at this point, that nothing, nothing, nothing in this human experience is any more real than what happens in those computer games.

They are very real experiences, experiences from which your soul has distilled incredible wisdom. But they are just experiences.

They’re not who you are. They’re not what actually happened to you.

They are just experiences, so let that in.


And so it is.

Translated intro text goes here. To show Spanish tab select tab block (not an inner text block), go to Advanced and remove class jm-ktabs-no-es

Haga clic en el triángulo para reproducir la grabación.

TRANSLATED_TITLE – por John McCurdy (Traducido por Liliana Audet)
Canalizado el DAY de MONTH de 2021

Translated transcript goes here.

* Nota: La canalización consciente es un acto de traducción de los sentimientos que llegan en palabras humanas para que la mente pueda entenderlos. Es un proceso impreciso y a veces salen de mi boca palabras equivocadas. En la grabación generalmente es bastante obvio cuál era el significado deseado, pero no es tan obvio en la transcripción, por lo que deben ser corregidas. Estas palabras o frases, si las hubiera, están marcadas con un asterisco (*), ya que son diferentes a las de la grabación.

Además, como la palabra hablada es muy diferente de la palabra correctamente escrita, junto con mi alma he editado ligeramente el texto. Mi (nuestra) atención no se centra en la buena gramática, sino en la claridad y la legibilidad sin que resulte demasiado confuso para aquellos que decidan leer mientras escuchan la grabación de audio. Los cambios que no afectan al significado no están marcados.

Al transcribir estos mensajes he decidido incluir muchos de los diversos ahhs, hmms y otros sonidos sin palabras que salen de mi boca mientras canalizo, porque indican un momento para hacer una pausa, tomar un respiro y reflexionar sobre lo que se acaba de decir. —John

9 thoughts on “The Roots of the Pain”

  1. Невероятно… Синхронично с первых предложений… Отзывается в каждой клетке моей собственной боли огромной глубокой благодарностью к вашему внутреннему мастеру Джону…

  2. I was ready for these words and the experience. I kept checking for a new message the last few days. It allowed me to go even deeper into letting go of duality. It has not been easy to have so much pain in the body and to just allow it and experience it, but knowing how my body gets confused because of all the judgments of good and bad helps me understand what is really going on. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences.

  3. Thanks so much, John – your channels are refreshingly real to us staying on the planet. You are staying here like us, and therefore everything you say is directly relatable and salient. Thanks again.
    P.S. I love the intro and completion music, who is the composer, please? thanks


Leave a Comment